Saturday, December 28, 2013

Putting Aside Petty BS for the final chapter

My friend Dr. Yeagley is going through some serious challenges in the final chapter. At this point I chose to place aside our differences and reach out to a friend in the final chapter. I am still faithful to my concept of the big table of equals Americanism. This is and remains the concept of the America I love and serve faithfully.

In the real world friends disagree about all manner of things. In truth some of the views of friends are at time repugnant. The fact that those on the far left who have ranted about racism, are exponents of a criminal faith that is quite proficient in sowing death and mindless hate when expedient.

In offering my prayers for a friend, I don't change my views. My prayers are for a good friend who is facing great adversity that we all must face sooner or later. My brushes with death were brief and could be overcome with strong legs, luck and presence. Yet even in those fleeting encounters my life was changed. After a second brush with death, I decided public service would be my calling. Making numbers on a series of never ending ledgers was not enough.

All of us need to find grace in our last days.

Friday, December 27, 2013

Returned Home

In my effort to make as special a Christmas for my daughter, I did not anticipate the creation of wonderful memories of my own. Being there when my daughter unwraps a gift and the family enjoys the holiday were memorable for me as well. From the smallest detail of the Maltese dogs following me everywhere to the
amusement that the adult kids adopted some of my odd habits it was a memorable holiday.

I was rather amused that my adult son uses what I call man soap. The product has a pleasant smell and keeps bad odors at bay in a manly way.

The holidays were memorable, but I am so tired and sore.

Tuesday, December 24, 2013

Away from Home

I will not be at my office for a while. I have been selected for a serious job that requires my logistics training at work. Given my choice, I would rather be at my desk serving the public and doing. However, this job takes precedence and I was selected for it.

I am guessing this is a two month assignment and it will involve plenty of overtime. I generally don't work overtime but this work is a very special situation. I also will need help from some of my fiends while I am away. I am down around eight cases and some of my friends will have to help until I return.

Management, wants me to do more teaching then doing in the next year. I have amply demonstrated that I can produce at will. My job is now to spend more time helping others increase production and to solve a festering problem.

I will be spending Christmas with my Guyanese family. Of course my daughter and granddaughter will be there. My nephew Drumaster  will be visiting. Of course there two Maltese will be there and the very strange mix that looks like a Havanese will be there. We are having BBQ leg of lamb, with rack of lamb and spinach pie.

The kids will be doing crafts. I will be tossing  lamb bones to the dogs who will be in heaven. As much as my Maltese love me as soon as they see a lamb bone look out. Little Rex is known to jump on the table look me in the eye and grab a bone off my plate if I don't produce them fast enough.  When I sleep he gnaws at those bones at my feet. He follows me around stopping to chew that bone as soon as I rest. He still like a turkey drumstick or chicken neck, but lamb bones are the best.

I will be sleeping over and away from home for a while.

Merry Christmas and at least the frummies will not visit my Guyanese family.  

Sunday, December 22, 2013

Who cares????

I do not watch Duck dynasty or plan to do so in the future. The comments were odious, but our First Amendment covers odious views. Gays should be upset with hypocrites who hold up this section of scripture and ignore all others. If we threw rocks at adulterers and people who masturbate we would run out of rocks quickly.

That being said Gays do a great job just being themselves and need to stop caring what low IQ types think. I doubt one persons views were changed by this drivel and if anything drawing attention to these stupid ramblings is pointless.

All of us need to just be ourselves and live comfortably in our own shoes. When I get my pile of rocks it will be for Commies who just don't get the concept of private property and are prone to treason.

The Tapestry of Irony

Life is very odd with its unexpected twists and turns. Those of you who have read this grasp I have survived a real nasty case of workplace bullying. Most people do not make it through as they move on or get fired . In my case I documented everything and prevailed over the psycho boss.

Those of you who read this also know my prior vocational training was in logistics. My degree is in the numbers side of business management. I will be spending more time teaching and mentoring new officers and helping experienced ones work smart not hard.

Oddly, I have been assigned as a consultant in the area where my former abuser works. I did advise top management that this is not a good idea. There is no doubt I can perform the task. However, it is tough to do so when the person you are advising has a blood vendetta against you. Top management assured me that this  has been considered. My own supervisor will be there covering my back and we are on the same page. There is a possibility this person will quit or seek a transfer rather than work with me. Of course learning from one's errors and completing the task at hand would be optimal. Serial Bullies tend to repeat their patterns and lack the human insight to grasp their errors.

Essentially, she has ruined my career. It is true that I could be promoted to a higher position, but I have lost invaluable time. Then again, I serve best as the oldest prisoner in the cell block. I teach the newbies how to get by and the old timers how to thrive. As a manager I would not be able to do this and those meetings are dreadful.

Saturday, December 21, 2013

2013

This was the year my career turned around. Oddly, the innovation and techniques to survive the work place bullying paid dividends. My choice was meet impossible goals of production and quality or die. Rather then die, I developed techniques and systems to meet impossible goals.

Eventually, the bully found herself in a staff position away from line workers. The new boss found the time saving techniques important to achieving unit goals. Some of my custom applications found their way into other offices. I mentored brand new employees and got them on track quickly. I had been doing the mentoring for years. Now it was appreciated. Ideas we assumed all people were doing were not being used.

I will be doing more mentoring. Oddly, smarter long term employees who have been there for years took the opportunity to learn.2014 looks to be a better year.

The shoes of the Beakerkin

Drumaster is doing very well in his new assignment and has earned a five figure raise. He got interviewed as a quirk. Isn't that Beakerkin's nephew, and hit the ball out of the park ever since. If things continue at their current pace people will say isn't that Drummasters Uncle.


Friday, December 20, 2013

More fun doing then coaching

With the change in management has come a new focus. I prefer to hit heavy and go about producing in anonymity. My numbers are very good and I have fused ideas from unlikely places into my routine. I was a logistics man and familiar with sweatshops in my previous employment. I altered my work routines to include some logistics concepts, used technology creatively and am naturally decisive. Adopting the techniques doesn't ensure everyone is a star, but it does produce productivity gains.

I will be spending more time mentoring and working on projects. I still will do officer work, but the focus will be more on helping others to boost their output. Teaching is fun, but just the same I would rather do.

Christmas with Beakerkin

I will be with my family for Christmas. Lets do this slowly for those not familiar. A Jewish guy is cooking a
Christmas meal for his Guyanese Hindu family with Maltese dogs. Now if we added a Muslim this improbable ethnic joke would be complete. I remind those who think they know me that above all other things I am a father and grandfather.

We will have a special guest Drummaster. As my family is way out in deep Queens it will be the first time he has met this familiy. To date my parents have met my daughter a few times although, she calls my mother every week or so. Oddly, my mother insisted that my daughter be given a ballet tutu which the kid wore to death pretending she was a princess. I have never heard of West Indians being into ballet and when the daughter wants to go my niece will substitute for me.


Tuesday, December 17, 2013

Dispelling the myths about workplace bullying

Over the last few days, I have been floored over the ignorance of some people in my daily life.

1) "If someone bullied me at work. I would confront them and chew them out."

Reality: Unless you are Mr. Beamish, this tactic will get you fired and possibly jailed. The bully wants you to over react and frequently plans to get you when you do. Jobs are scarce and throwing away your career is not an option.

2) " I would form my own clique and show them"

Reality: You have become a pariah and people run from you. They may talk to you in private, but that is it. Your reputation has been smeared and people are now treating you like a disease.

3) "I would get witnesses".

Reality: People correctly fear for their career and won't risk their necks for you. If your abuser is high up the management chain they will bully you and join the crowd and look to promote themselves over the corpse of your career.

4) " I would go up the chain".

Reality: Even when the abuse is well documented, management is aware of the abuse and at least tacitly approves of this abuse. The sole exception is if someone high up knows you personally. In many cases the abuse is from a supervisor and you talk to their boss and get yelled at for violating the chain of command.

5) I would go to human resources or the companies mental health professionals.

Reality " Human Resources almost always side with management and will not even look at doccumentation. They are not called support staff for nothing". The mental health professionals can not be trusted to protect your confidence and will not risk jeopardizing their account for you.

6) I would go to the Union

Reality: The Unions can save your job if they wish. They also negotiate with management and at times are buddy buddy and make deals. If it suits them fine, but don't count on much. They are just as apt to turn on you as a noisy wheel and blame you for being bullied.

What you can do

1) Document everything. Send emails to yourself so that times and dates are not disputed.
2) Seek professional help
3) Try as best as possible to spend time with your family and on hobbies.
4) Remember, it is a war and you will lose most of the battles. It is frustrating but your goal is to be alive
at the end of the war.
5) Afterwards, be open about what happened. Do not forgive instigators and forgive followers as much as possible.

Friday, December 13, 2013

The Peasants and the Land Remain

There were many changes at work. It is tough seeing so many close friends I worked with move to another area. There will be new friends and a few old foes returning. I have remained in my office with a really great manager. Like the proverbial peasant and the land I remain in the area called the slums.

I always liked the slums and never wanted to leave it even when offered a window. It is an area away from most and i found peace there. For me it was a place to pass the years and serve the public. It is a short walk to the waiting room, fridge and copier. The vegan was there for a spell. A wonderful coworker I mentored who later became a beloved boss was there. A promising new rookie, I mentored, passed through likely on her way to bigger things. A new cast will be joining me soon including a person I went to training with and another who I had a good relationship with years back.

The landscape changes yet, I remain in the slums. Oddly, I have been in the same office longer than anyone else in my area. In the end the land and the peasants remain and the years pass.

I even joke about the peasants remaining while the world changes. We don't see Fonzie still at the garage riding the motorcycle while Richie has grown up with kids in 1970. Yet I am still in the same spot with artwork on the wall listening to surf music and preparing for another hectic day. Over years the lawyers appreciate my style and work ethic. Most don't forget their immigration officer and every now and then I get a thank you from people I have long forgotten about.

Part of me wonders if it would be a good thing to have moved with some of my old friends. Then again my office has become larger than me. The joke is the Yankees play in Yankee Stadium, The Giants play in the Meadowlands and still Playing at the Oasis in the Slums is Beakerkin. I remain in the Oasis a midst the art
and movie photos still cracking jokes. I will mentor a new cast and tell new jokes as time goes by.

I remember when an obnoxious type started up with me. I pointed out " I will be in that office long after you are gone and forgotten. This has turned out to be truer then I ever would have grasped.

Thursday, December 12, 2013

New Assignment

My rehabilitation is complete. My reputation in the agency was quite bad for many years. I experienced a classic case of work place bullying. Special rules and procedures were invented for one employee only. It did not matter that the lawyers r with my work told top management that I was a superior officer.

I took the bad experiences and dedicated it to mentoring the new officers. I served as a mentor and friend to many. One of those I mentored became my boss and she rehabilitated my reputation. There are those who would be jealous that a person I mentored became my boss. In my case my career was over and I was glad she earned the promotion the right way through superior effort, integrity, and ability. I would have selected her over myself.

Over time I have got a reputation as an easy employee to manage. More enlightened management understood,  that I am a gamer. There are those people you can count on to produce and win it when the game is on the line. They know I never miss an assignment and am meticulous with preparation. I often can pick up workers who have fallen behind while knocking back my own work.

The more elite supervisors understand my nuances. They grasp I am frequently ahead of schedule. The one I mentored somehow knew how far ahead better than I did. I would say 20 minutes and she knew an hour. It is likely because she also knows I can pick it up when I need to.

My health hasn't been the best, but I never miss an assignment. When the game is on I still answer the bell and deliver. On days there are no interviews I rest a bit. I reminded some very new officers not to worry about my style. If one is prepared, experienced and above all competent then a touch of levity is to be expected. One of the things I stress is I help others when they ask, but I don't get involved in their business and I expect the same.

Having a good reputation is a huge advantage. When I explain that the job will take a touch longer to deal with because it has been reassigned the attorneys understand and don't rush me. I try to finish everything on the first day and keep everything on schedule whenever possible.

My current boss asked me what team I would like to be on. I specified that I prefer my current leader, but I have an excellent relationship with the new team leader. I got my wish and I was told that I would be going to yet another supervisor and I would be happy with my assignment.

In the old days my reputation was so bad that nobody wanted to manage me. Now I am considered a highly desired team member and several supervisors asked for me. In reality I owe my new found reputation to that new employee I mentored. I wish she stuck around to climb the chain, but like me her heart was in it for the right reasons. She wanted to work in a different branch of the service and she followed her dream.

I don't think I would be happy being kicked upstairs or to the more important areas. I am just happy in my own corner with the ordinary serving the public.


 

Monday, December 09, 2013

Quiet but effective

The family in Queens is very poor. Usually, when I cook I over-shop and the extras end up being used even if they are unlikely to be planned menu items. The items help out and believe me food does run short there.
I had to make an emergency visit as the daughter's cell phone had to be paid. God forbid her mother could pay the bill. I was way deep in Chinatown almost by the East River getting my CDS refinished. It is cheaper and more convenient to take the scratches out then buy new ones. The Chinatown buses have dirt cheap fares. I think Washington DC to Chinatown is 20 dollars but I still prefer Amtrak.

I run out with my daughter to charge her cell phone . I tell her on the way back we will stop in for shakes Chocolate, Vanilla Strawberry or Banana. The two year old granddaughter  yells out she wants a banana shake. I said I 'will get you strawberry. The kid says no banana. I get a large Vanilla shake and a small banana shake and the kid actually likes the stuff. My daughter in law just shook her head and said it really wasn't bad. The granddaughter eats odd things that frequently appear when I visit like spinach rolls or oddly kasha. I had a batch from the deli and the kid has learned to eat the stuff. I explain it is adult food, but it does not appear to register. Spinach pie is likely innocuous anyway.


Sunday, December 08, 2013

True Christians

The efforts of the neighbors of AOW to build a ramp and decorate the yard are what the holidays are about. True Christians have been helping the neighbors long before the power mad progressives turned to a cult of theft. Give me a community of Christians over a community of progressives any day of the week.

Took Sluggo to my Diner

I happened to be across the street from the diner when Drummaster's sister visited. I decided to go for my special hot chocolate that is not on the menu. I showed her the cast of the diner and the famous lines that the regulars and staff use when I enter. The waiter does not have a Greek letter yet and is still a work in progress. However, he suggested animal fries which had the niece curious. Animal fries are french fries topped with meat sauce and mozzarella cheese. It is an ingredient in the monkey burger.

I have to pick up the CDs at Essex street. It is a very long walk from my office. It is somewhat easier with the M15 bus. CDs are expensive and if they can be salvaged with a treatment it is good. One of the CDs is Jay Black. and I have not heard that one in six months. I like his version of Walking in the Rain. I have other versions of it as well. I also preordered a Fabulous Wailers CD from Japan. Sadly, Gail Harris seems to appear only on the live album on two tracks.

Saturday, December 07, 2013

Just Missed the Duck On the Gathering Storm

I was on the line waiting to Duck hunt when an attorney arrived for a conference. I am able to listen to the show and work at the same time. In that case, I was required to get a file from the courts and prepare the case for completion. I had two of them yesterday. The other one also required a trip to a different section.
Oddly, I had the file made interview ready when I shipped it out. I did not expect to see it again.

The Duck is complaining about government snooping. This is from a person who has defended countries with block associations and press control.

So called Progressives are professional liars. Our new Communist Mayor was largely elected on promising to stop Stop and Frisk. The business community and wealthy citizens express genuine concern over his Mickey Marxist baboon ideas and he appoints a Guliani police commissioner who pioneered the idea and expanded its use in LA. In LA I was one of the people stopped for questioning. NYC police are clever enough that they don't stay at crowded intersections looking for people who made it across a busy street when the light was yellow. In this stupid exchange lets see some ID. Oh officer X what are you doing in town
don't enter the street when its blinking even if you  can make it to the other side. In my case I planned to stop at a traffic island. This is normal behavior and having police do this outside of a Federal Office is stupid.

Stopping federal employees on their lunch break going to get a shwarma sandwich is not smart. To those in LA our street vendors in NYC actually sell better food than many of your restaurants. The place in NYC across the street seels better shwarma then the resturant across the street, Non NYC types thought this was exotic fare but in NYC almost everything is available anywhere.

I went with Drummaster to visit a new record store in Williamsburg. Rough Cut is a great experience, but I think the restaurants are a better reason to visit the area than  the stores. I stopped in for world class food at the Rosarita Fish Shack. It was the best food I have had in years. Actually the food and service were the best that I have experienced in a long time.

In fairness, I find one or two places I like and stay there. In Staten Island I pretty much live at the Greek Diner. There used to be a Chinese place that I used to visit. However, when the owner sold the new owner did not build a relationship. In fact the waiter did point out that I was a frequent customer. A smarter owner understands building ties to customers. The food was not as good and had the owner made a minimal effort i might have stayed. It was just easier to relocate full time to the Greek Diner where the food is always very good and the service is outstanding. The regulars tend to sit at the counter busting jokes. The families sit at the booth. When non regulars are at the counter then we tone the jokes down. Usually, the jokes are about the employees or the regulars.

Thursday, December 05, 2013

Buying my tree tonight

Despite the fact that I am not Christian, I purchase my daughters Christmas tree every year. It is the odd spectacle of a Jewish father buying a Christmas Tree for his Hindu daughter. Last year the tree was too big.

Sunday, December 01, 2013

Damned Coworker

One of my coworkers got me to try and whistle the notes from the three Graces Billy Boy. I can not hit those notes as much as I try. I am somewhat better at matching the claps at Hand Clapping Time by Gino and Johnny Greek. Now having a two year old grand kid imitate the Doo Wop noises was priceless

Saturday, November 30, 2013

Redemption

Those of you I talk with off line understand the troubles I faced. When I left my assignment in Vermont I experienced work place bullying. It was blatant and obvious to those who were around. I was subjected to brutal treatment and subjected to absurd charges.

One of the culprits falsely labeled me a problem worker. The culprits were removed from my area and magically my rating is now outstanding. The irony is the same person who falsely labeled me sub par had to sign the certificate.

This person is retiring after a long career. As he is on his way out, I spoke to him and asked him why he allowed this abuse. Beaky when X gets on a roll look out. You know how obsessed she gets and it was a mistake. I pointed out multiple practitioners spoke to him and pointed out this error. Beaky, when X gets on a roll it is easier to get out of the way. I am sorry.

It doesn't sound like much, but it is better then most get. Had I been merely average or weaker I would have been broken by this treatment. In essence, this boss is right on a level, it takes courage and strength to do the right thing. I don't look down upon someone for lacking courage, because it is the norm. Oddly, I will continue to pay the price for being bullied. I was not given opportunities my skills and dedication earned long ago. Yet rather then pout, I dedicated myself to teaching the new staff how to survive in a demanding job. I pointed to my door and reminded new officers that the place was much different when I arrived.

I will also credit another former boss who was more blunt when she got promoted. Beaky, I should never have written those reports but you know how X is. Now that I am running the spot you will be left alone.
She also took on some of the bullies because it suited her agenda. I was one of the few that backed this person or had anything good to say.

This person who stood by will be retiring soon. Believe it or not, I will go to honor him at whatever dinner
they throw when his retirement is formalized.

Oddly, I owe part of my redemption to a person I trained and later became my boss. She pointed out that I was very easy to manage and was unfairly maligned. Newbies asked if I was jealous that someone I trained became my boss. I told them I was elated for her and would have chosen her over myself as a better candidate. Also my career for all intents and purposes was over with the bullying. My chance to move up was tragically lost due to the obsessions of a deranged lunatic. My focus was to serve the public to the best of my ability and make sure my peers had a chance to get those opportunities denied to me.

Sometimes, I am sorry is enough. I can't get my name or career back. However, it is obvious my critics were very mistaken.

One thing that is odd is the propensity of those promoted due to nepotism to be bullies. Competent people grasp the value of using people's talent to the best of their abilities. We win and lose as a team and those that
did not earn their roles don't know the first thing about teamwork, leadership or competence.

Wrong about Gay Marriage

Over the last few years my position on gay marriage has evolved. I have spent the last few weeks with gay couples and seeing how they interact. Any reservations I had about the idea was wrong.

There were those who can't look beyond their bigotry and challenge their assumptions. I am talking about peers who refused their sworn duty to uphold the laws and above all treat the public humanely. Funny, that until my vocal opposition to bigotry at work, I was known as a Conservative. When this mess started, I told the instigators I am not on board with failure to perform and carry out my duties.

I also won't hear lectures about courage from knaves. When I was threatened with termination for refusing to carry out orders I knew were illegal I stood up and placed my career on the line for what I believed in. I also paid a very high price for upholding those ideas. The mistreatment I endured for years until the system righted the wrongs is best described as workplace bullying. The mistreatment directly impacted my career.

From that point forward, I made a choice to be a mentor and never allow anyone to feel bullied. I spent my time teaching new peers the ropes and avoided notice. My initial fight was to see the system respect the public and treat the public as humans. My experiences led me to rethink things and see for myself. As a NYC resident gays are very much a part of the community and always have been as far as I can recall. The notion of mistreating people over a private matter is repugnant to me.

I am thankful that I don't hold onto ideas that I know are wrong out of foolish pride or vanity. It also helps that it is unthinkable not to show law abiding members of the public heart felt hospitality. When one comes to my work space I welcome them and get them to relax, unless there is a reason not to.

I don't call all those who oppose gay marriage bigots. My reservations were about government intrusion on religious terms. I also grasp the notion of legal equity and fairness. Some of us need to rethink the mater and look at ourselves.

Friday, November 29, 2013

Spent time with the daughter.

The daughter knew I was home because one of the Maltese jumped out of the front yard and ran to me. I spent time with my daughter and her adult brother and sister in law. I cooked the Turkey and filled the house with food. The dogs followed me from room to room. When I finally rested the Maltese slept in their normal
spots. It was odd because I typically sleep in the coldest spot as it is easier to fall asleep there.

I made a decent turkey and the daughter in law did the rest. I have grown to love the grandchild who calls my name and drinks whatever odd thing I have. In this case it was warm apple cider. I explained it was an adult beverage and made her premium hot chocolate. Now I somehow got a silly kid that keeps demanding warm cider. I had the granny smith version but the kid kept asking for it. I warned the kid it was sour but the kid asked for more. It is also hard to keep barrel pickles in the house as everyone has learned to eat them even when junk food is available.

Wednesday, November 27, 2013

Putting Crap Aside

Dr Yeagley has terminal cancer and is in Chemotherapy. I want to point out that I disagree with him on many things, but it was not and never was personal. We share a love of America, but we see it in very different terms. I am still committed to my vision of a big table of equals where everyone who shares a belief in the principles of the founding fathers is my sibling. As Communists like Ducky, reject those values they are not and can never in any definition be American in spirit. In the case of Yeagley. it is tragic because we share a love for the same concept but have a very different view of Americanism.

All of us are not eternal. All of us get the message the Doc has been given at some point unless we die by the hand of God. Sometimes I wonder how much of a favor the man upstairs did by guiding me to safety in two terrorist attacks, transportation and industrial accidents. Yet at the end of the day all of us wonder why we were here and did we just take up space and waste our opportunity. Sometimes, I wonder how much Officer Beakerkin is Beakerkin. I have done some remarkable things and changed lives as an Officer and not so much so as Beakerkin. My love for my daughter, daughter in law and grandchild are close to my heart. I am never happier then when I am with them and I will see them tomorrow. My grandchild who is two called to remind me to bring her Swedish Fish.

I have known many great romances and in my younger days did things that I am not proud of. Yes those loves and wild passions were intense, but my happiest moments of my life were spent with my daughter and grandchild. After that being an officer meant everything to me and enduring workplace bullying and its aftermath was worth the joy and accomplishment the job provides.

I guess as Thanksgiving approaches we look at our lives and eternity and are thankful for our lot. All of us sit with relatives some loved and many despised. I used to love Rav Roov as a kid, but over time his Frum lifestyle and family have grown to disgust me. The brother I knew was a wonderful kid. The incompetent boor with his never ending visits and hypocritical megalomania is not someone I care for. At least on this Thanksgiving I will be spared one of his many visits and yes I am still pissed about the car. I wouldn't be pissed if his useless, stupid know it all wife ever got a job. I would be less pissed if his ignorant kids would seek gainful employment. Funny, all the religious icons had hard jobs and these mendicant fools think a lifetime on the dole is acceptable. Sorry, but marrying a butt ugly wife, making zero money teaching in a Yeshiva is worse then never being born. In truth at least if this mediocrity was a mechanic or worked a real job he would have a life. This religious sloth and going through life as useless, stupid and incompetent annoys me.

I wish my friend Doctor Yeagley courage on a journey all of us take. I disagree with him on many things, but it is never personal. I certainly hope that he finds peace in his remaining time and seeks out those he loves in his final days.

Thanksgiving message to all. Now some of us are going to endure relatives we despise and bad food this holiday. I want those of us to remember how there are those somewhere who are worse of then you. As I munch away I will be thinking of my beloved friend the Vegan who I love but will be eating Tofurkey. I love the vegan as a friend, but Tofurkey is hideous and should only be served at GITMO. As for relatives no family on the planet is worse then Rav Roov who is over every second. The other day I went out for a walk disgusted by the latest of his never ending visits. A drunk driver missed me by twenty feet and I was actually cursing the man upstairs for his bad aim. At least if the driver got me I would be spared these annoying visits. I actually envy the man across the street his brother is in prison. Why Rav Roov never spends any time with his wife's family is obvious as they must despise them as well and they are frum.

I am thankful to all of you out there and want you to count your blessings. It may be bad your days may have some trouble. You may experience an act of God you didn't expect or yet another terrorist attack, but all of this is small potatoes next to the greatest plague God ever invented these repeated and never ending visits of my Frum brother and his obnoxious family. God should have spared the first born Egyptians and just sent Rav Roov and his annoying family to visit Pharaoh  and talk of midah and chesed while being on the dole.



Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Smoooooooth

My day went really well and I got a huge jump on my work for today yesterday. I used the time between interviews to get ahead even while doing an extra interview. Plan ahead and stay alive.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Sunday, November 24, 2013

Will be on the Gathering Storm this Week

On Friday, I will be calling in to talk with Warren. Fridays are difficult days in my office because that is the day we do three functions. We receive attorneys and close old cases. We also clear the decks for new cases. This week I cleared 19 cases out including four that had to be reworked from scratch because a poorly motivated peer failed to move them. A typical Officer moves twenty a week my numbers are to the North of that figure. Lastly we prepare for Monday and get a jump. My schedule was 7-7-4 which is almost capacity. It has been bumped to 8-7-4 and will likely go higher. As I am well prepared I can move quickly and get a jump on Tuesday.

 The cases for Wed. are dreaded local cases that have been around for years and that four is a very difficult number. This is especially bad when these imbeciles who have cases going on for decades refuse to hire an attorney. Sorry but most of these clods found the time and money to hire smugglers but can't afford an attorney or refuse to do so. When you read about horror stories in the paper read carefully to see if the unfortunates hired a professional.

In any immigration reform the public should be charged extra for not having forms filled out by licensed professionals/ They should also be charged extra for subsequent applications. After number three they should be barred from filing unless it is handled by a professional. These poorly prepared forms waste the governments time and resources. Of course one does not hear crusading journalists ever spend a second asking why people use travel agents and beauticians to prepare frivolous applications that waste time or resources.

That being said I will make a phone call and talk to Warren. I am stunned that I don't think I have been a guest since 2008.  I think Warren and I did a show later then that. Thus far the Duck has never shown up on the air when I am there. He is obviously enjoying some North Korean or Venezuealan goodies made by Workers Paradise peasants.

Saturday, November 23, 2013

On the Gathering Storm

I called into the Gathering Storm Radio show. I was on for a very short call wishing WC and AOW a very happy Thanksgiving. I have not appeared since 2008. Friday in NYC is a day that we meet with the public and prepare for the long grind of the next week.

Next week I will be close to maximum capacity. I spent the time straightening cases from a peer. My case load was seven, but I selected an extra case for fun. Now I am at capacity and in theory I should not get additional cases. This never quite works out as frequently, my numbers are over capacity. These numbers are produced by preparation.

That being said I should still make myself more available to AOW as a future guest. I tend to be comedic and the show really isn't comedy based. However, some good matured levity is usually good radio.

Thursday, November 21, 2013

Workplace Bullying It Can Happen To You

One of the things I caution workers about is workplace bullying. Even though I was an experienced professional before I got to NYC, I experienced it upon my arrival in NYC. It is a nasty experience for the workers and the public we serve. How do we begin to treat the public with respect when management  brutalizes the workers.

When I was being bullied coworkers said "keep your head down". We do not say this to victims of domestic abuse, nor should we say this to people enduring workplace bullying. The union was not very helpful as there are no laws covering workplace bullying. Unfortunately, unless the abuse falls into a protected class there is little that can be done. In my case it did fall into a protected class eventually. What made the abuse more insidious was my second line supervisor ordered the first line to be abusive. I complained above the second line and was told go through your chain of command. Human resources was next to useless and at best will offer counseling at worst side with the abusers.

Miraculously, once my abuser was sent to the rubber room my evaluations returned to above average. I tell people that I am the same worker, merely freed from daily abuse. I channeled this energy into mentoring new officers and those who listen to my techniques do well. I never expected to be a leader or mentor to so many peers. New management grasps that I am a pressure performer. The other day a peer froze and I had to perform additional work. It was not a big deal and I shifted my schedule handled it and returned to my assigned duties. 

We do have a manager who has these tendencies and she went off on maternity leave. Her flunkies had the nerve to ask me to give her some of my annual leave. I gave a clerk 28 hours and a fellow officer 45 hours for her maternity leave. To this very day I do not speak to this supervisor. When she addresses me it is a one word response yes or okay. In this person's case her buffoonish behavior cost her a weeks pay. Allegedly, motherhood has changed her. However, I have no interest in interacting with this person. I have told her if it is work related I will perform my assigned tasks. I have no interest in idle chit chat, due to her previous actions. The best thing one can do with a workplace bully is avoid them and keep all interactions to a minimum. Document everything and take the issue directly to management.

My current supervisor is a stronger individual and has told this person to worry about her own workers. In my case, I pretty much perform my work and keep my boss informed. It is normal behavior for an experienced team member.

I am one of the most popular coworkers in my unit with an outstanding reputation for fairness with the local legal community. I am still the same professional, yet I was once bullied in the same job. Special rules unique to me we created and enforced only on me. Positive attributes were spun into negatives for the sole purpose of damaging my reputation. I was charged with things that were physically impossible. How was I AWOL
if I heard six cases and your own records show it? 

All workers need to be held accountable for their actions. However, supervisors need to be held to the same standard of ethics as everyone else. Oddly, in my specific cases, the abusers seem to have acquired their positions through nepotism. In both cases the abusers had a parent working for the same agency and received promotions their performance likely did not warrant. A genuine leader has no need to abuse others to make themselves look good. An incompetent whose abilities and performance are dubious at best will 
can abuse others in an attempt to cover up their lack of skills.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

Lost in talk of Immigration Reform

Any discussion of genuine immigration reform should be expedited removal. A real problem is cases that take decades. They go through endless appeals and there is little penalty for filing frivolous applications. In this case all the applicant has to do is win once.

We also need to alter the laws involving original charges. Any combination of three arrests within the last five years should render a person inadmissible. One or two items can be a mistake but when one is talking three or more.

The asylum system needs to be blown up and restructured. Three arrests in the USA for anything while the case is pending should get the person sent back home. In general this would directly impact the shadiest applications directly. 

Temporary Protective Status should come with a three year cap. No country should be allowed to extend for any natural disaster beyond three years. We still have people here for hurricane Mitch more then a decade later. These people have returned home a few times making a mockery of the system. Situations involving wars should be the sole exception to the three year rule.

People who file their own forms without an accredited attorney should pay a 50% premium. Non attorney forms preparers would have to take specific tests with a federal id annually. Attorneys would have to take a test every five years and be subject to minimum educational requirements similar to CPA's. 

Fee waivers for citizenship should be eliminated. The sole exception for this is for members of the active duty military who should get 50% discounts. Disabled veterans and retired military veterans should get 75%. Those who can not afford the fees should be offered installment plans. 

Sunday, November 17, 2013

Endgame

I am in the process of making some changes to my life. There are those around me whose presence drives me nuts. I have decided to walk away from my family and wish them well.

Those of you whom I know off line know that at times my life has not been easy. I have lived through terrorist attacks, workplace bullying, every sort of romantic disaster and generally landed on my feet after a few moments. It helps to have a good sense of humor when life lobs some nasty stuff at you.

The visits of my brother and his religious Adams family proved too much. I really was not the same when his wife's uselessness turned into a summer of hell. Then her uselessness ended up costing me a car. Faced with the prospect of additional visits and never ending stupidity I decided to walk away from everything and remove myself from my family.

This does not mean I will find the answers I seek. For whatever reasons I only find peace and joy in the role of Officer and father. I will never endure theses endless visits and live my days in peace.

In a nutshell this is the reality of living with Frum relatives.

1) They are self centered and think you exist to serve them
2) They feign interest that they care, but it is for their interests only
3) They will manipulate relatives to get what they want. After all they are pious so if someone is getting pissed it is because they are eeeevil.
4) They are lazy
5) They are socially retarded and useless outside the frummie world.
6) They are painfully stupid outside theological banal texts
7) They do not respect your time.
8) They say they don't want charity while taking your stuff.
9) They have no sense of responsibility and at times are child like
10) You can't ever count on them for anything.

Friday, November 15, 2013

The Silence of the Obamunists

It didn't take long for the Obamunists to go into Omerta. Gene "Jones" Zitver was quite verbose about defending Obamacare and blaming the shutdown on those wascally wepublicans. It turns out that the GOP was 100% correct in its critique and Chairman Zero will be tweaking it again and again.

The emperor Obama can't lead and his policies are worse then any ten Natural disasters. Ranting about the Tea Party does not change the fact Obamacare does not work. In this matter the TEA Party is 100% correct.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

What I learned from the DOMA cases

The subject of the DOMA cases remains sensitive at work. There are those who just harbor an illogical hatred in their heart for gays. There is no rationale for this hatred and in general those felling this disdain are not our best and brightest.

One thing that I enjoy with working these DOMA cases is that people should be comfortable with who they are. If you can not accept people for being themselves it is your problem not theirs. The matter is a private matter and those that look down their noses at these individuals are frequently not their social or intellectual equals.

I was hoping that some of the people who are balking would grow up or at least be open to intellectual growth. The sad part is that when you hold hatred in your heart, it says more about you then the person you hate.

Of course our local neighborhood Communist will point out, I despise Communists. Communists are political criminals and mental health defectives who endorse a belief system that has proven lethal and is hostile to the essence of Americanism. Any claim that Communists are enlightened is laughable with their obsessions about Jews and actual Christians. Communism is a moral and mental health defect and this is why Communists frequently play word games to hide their identity.

As for Communists, the old saying is be yourself unless you are a jerk. Communists should smile remain silent as much as possible, take their meds and return to whatever mental health facility they have escaped from as soon as possible.

Monday, November 11, 2013

Return of the Frummies

Being a frummie means that even the simplest tasks in life are beyond your competence. The same frummie dimwit was charged with a single task place one kid on a plane and send him to Yeshiva. That was supposed to happen two months ago. 

My exasperation and anger at these incompetent baboons is at wits end.

My brother needs my car and points out I barely used it and he is broke. I point out he wouldn't be broke if his wife would get a job. Being religious is used a crutch for avoiding work and sponging off others. I am at wits end with these parasites.

My family is concerned what is left of my possessions will end up in Guyana. Better to live in Guyana among the poor and criminal then the pious and lazy. 

The funny part is when these clowns are not around I am known for being cheery and tolerant. I can not stand these clowns and want them to vanish. Twenty five years of sloth and not working. Twenty five years of excuses and pious shit is enough. 

Find your religion on your own dime and get the %*^(*() out of my sight.


Sunday, November 10, 2013

Rare Day With Family

I try to limit my time with the family to 30 minutes. The daughter needed Dad time as her crisis was her cell phone died. I was a short distance away. What is curious is that you can not pay multiple months on her phone ahead.

As I was about to depart the litle dogs made a fuss. The granddaughter (long story) called for me. Against better judgement I spent the evening. My daughter is now almost the size of her mother and rather then me go out again we ordered Tommy's Pizza. I am not a fan of Jalapeno and chicken as I am old school.

When I left it created a huge hole in the family that is huge around this time of year. For the sake of the kid and grand child I will make a truce. The daughter can be quite clever. She had her mom take her to the place we used to eat regularly and showed her my spot at the counter. They renovated the old diner and it is a better place, but I miss the old owner and staff. 

I do love some of the stores on Jamaica. Oddly my daughter wants clay and art supplies, I have no idea what she wants to make. She made me a bracelet I appreciate the thought but never wear jewelry of any kind.

Saturday, November 09, 2013

Being a NYC type

Over the last few days, I have had the honor to work the same sex cases. From my perspective gays and lesbians are and always were a part of the community. They were great coworkers, the person a few apartments up the block and in a handful of cases distant relatives. I worked in the fashion industry for years and they certainly were there. I lived in lower Fifth Avenue and they were certainly my neighbors.

The notion that anyone gay or otherwise should be made to feel unwelcome because of being yourself is abhorrent to me. One of my favorite sayings is be yourself for better or worse and if by nature you are a jerk smile a lot and wave and remain silent.

The fact that I have plenty of friends who are gay does not change who I am. Plenty of times I have had lunch with a coworker who was gay or lesbian. Anyone who has a problem with that needs to grow up. In Vermont a really ignorant worker mistook me for a homosexual and called me gay. The person used plenty of gay slurs and this was seen by a friend in human resources. The friend urged me to file charges. My response was to file charges would be admitting that I had a problem with gays. Being mistaken for gay from my perspective is akin to being mistaken for being of a different ethnicity. Do I get offended when people ask if I am Hungarian or Ukrainian?  If I don't get offended when people mistake me for the wrong ethnicity why should I get offended when people mistake me for a homosexual.

That being said, gay people do face more abuse at work then anyone else. The very people who would end your career for the N word think nothing of freely using slurs for gays and lesbians. All epithets are wrong and just as the N word is wrong so is calling someone a faggot or a bull dyke. I don't believe that the N word is more heinous then any of those other epithets. There is no excuse for using that word or making abusive jokes about anyone.

One of the things that annoy me is the notion that as a professional I need special training to treat gays or anyone else with respect. This should be second nature to all decent professionals. In the instances where I have to be more assertive it is because of the behavior issues such as criminal arrests or legal matters. Even then the focus is on the behavior such as repeated drinking and driving not the ethnicity or whatever else.

The applicants still get a warm interview with a touch of wit and verve. In one instance a person thanked me and said you have no idea how many times I have been abused in this building thank you. The sad part is that I actually understand that better then he thinks. One of the things I fought for was a customer driven approach. The classic Stalanistist approach there will be no laughter or smiling is not the face of real customer service. In fact I was working in a back office far from the customers and a brute of a supervisor
started screaming at me "THERE WILL BE NO LAUGHTER". It was part of a pattern of work place abuse and my coworkers noticed. This did not stop this very same supervisor from gossiping about her personal life for hours, making scores of personal calls on the public dime. In my case her boss witnessed this behavior and moved me to a supervisor with humanity.

Laughing together is quite different from laughing at people, An actor came in and I joked with that name you sound like you should be killing Orcs. We joked about a mythical Axel Hammerman in accounting or  Nadine Slacker as a personal trainer.

On a personal level, many times at the end of an interview people thank me. There are many time I wonder if I should be thanking them for letting me share such a special moment. The attorneys grasp that my office is a special place where we provide genuine customer service with wit and warmth.



Thursday, November 07, 2013

Workplace Bullying

The Jonathan Martin bullying story has made it to the front page of the New York Times. This is a taboo topic about the American work place that should have been discussed long ago. The reaction of the players shows some of the problems. Incredibly stupid Miami players are blaming the bullied for not stepping forward and quitting on the team. Others blame Martin for having allowed this to go on. This illustrates the rather typical ignorance about this issue. We don't or shouldn't blame battered spouses for being hit.

In most situations the chain of command is the problem. Those in the chain make themselves unavailable or feign ignorance of the situation. Human resources offers zero help, unless this situation falls into an EEO category and even then the person reporting it like in the Martin case is labeled a trouble maker or a quitter.  

The Unions are not very helpful in this regard. Many times they don't inform the target about multiple complaints of a similar nature by this person. In some cases the Union representatives merely add to the problem by telling the target keep your head down. 

I was talking to a person who works in another Federal Agency. We both understood that the real truth is gays and lesbians are frequently the most verbally abused people in the office. The N word is and should remain a taboo. Yet the very same people who would end your career for using that term or at any imagined hint of racism freely utter gay slurs. Maybe when we get to a more enlightened future these terms will be treated with a fraction of the seriousness of the N word. The person was appalled at the conditions I described. 

We need to understand that it is never okay to blame the victim. In many cases management is aware and feigns ignorance that the bullying took place. The abuse of this person by peers is encouraged by the abuser.
Others see it and keep their distance from the victim. In reality if these charges surface few if any witnesses ever step forward. It is part of a culture of unaccountability in the American workplace that needs to be remedied. As it stands unless the abuser bumps into a protected class within the EEO there is no accountability for the worst instances of workplace bullying. 

Tuesday, November 05, 2013

Did my first DOMA work

I did my first DOMA cases today. The concept of legal equity is one that is at the center of my legal philosophy. We don't have second class citizens gay or otherwise. I swore an oath to uphold the Constitution and obey the law and this is the law.

One of the odd things about me is that I am meticulous with certain things. I preach and live preparation before the person walks in the door. On the rare case it isn't possible because I am helping out a peer that has fallen behind or another coworker is sick I endeavor to maintain my high personal standards. Someone asked Joe DiMaggio why he tried so hard. The person is going to see me one and I owe it to them and myself to be at my best no matter what.

Along the way I learned some odd things. If you are having fun people will have fun with you, its infectious. If you get people to relax and instill confidence with a genuine welcome and let them know you know who they are and why they are here it goes a long way. Laughing together with people is a different animal then laughing at them, Be yourself unless you are a jerk and in that case say as little as possible.

The cases went very well. I had minimal alteration of my style and everyone enjoyed their visit. Service with a genuine smile and verve seems to work for most. If you respect the public and genuinely want to serve, the public grasps the real thing as opposed to a painted smile.  

Monday, November 04, 2013

Hey idiots threats of violence are worse then racial slurs

Lost in the mania over racial epithets in the NFL scandal is threats of violence. There is no excuse for physical threats or violence. There was no crude attempt at humor. This was classic bullying by a baboon who should never play in the NFL again.

Had this been your average practical joke this would be no big deal. Placing shaving cream in a shoe is harmless fun. Mental abuse is no laughing matter.

Bill Di Blassio Communist and TEA PARTY delusions

Someone who has been pro Communist and painfully ignorant his entire life should be careful about criticizing anyone's political views. Lets see Communists killed 100, 000, 000 and the TEA Party and the KKK would have to go a few thousand years before they even get to a few million. This is assuming Di Blassio's Communist buddies don't revert to form.

Is Bill Di Blassio a Cheech and Chong stoner creation. Vote for stupid, lazy, useless, clueless and amoral Bill Di Blassies. It should be a news event if he ever gets a coherent thought. Bellvue moves into Gracie Mansion.

Friday, November 01, 2013

Workplace talk

The recent revelation that a professional athlete has sought help for this issue should shatter stereotypes. In this case the abused is a Stanford educated pro from a rock solid family. The target is likely much more intelligent and in this case physically stronger then those dishing out the abuse.

Workers should expect reasonable criticism when they under perform. This goes double when the failure impacts the team. In my case we had two examples yesterday. A newer officer got a tad gun shy with a rather large case and called in sick. The result was that this massive case was dumped on me at the last second. In an amazing coincidence the attorney got hit by a car and the case had to be rescheduled. In this case some joking is to be expected. The lack of heart directly impacted a fellow officer. Teamwork depends on knowing who you can count on in a tight spot. As this was a one time episode and not part of a larger pattern it is no big deal after some light humor.

The second one is a bit more serious. An officer has abused sick time impacting my work load. In my case even when I am ill, I make it to work so that others don't have to do my cases. I usually come early to prepare so I can even take an extra case or two in an emergency. In this case a new officer has been absent so often I have had to pick up close to fifty of his cases. In this case he was late and I had to pick up an extra case. Ordinarily this is no big deal, however as this person has a clear pattern comedic justice if not remedial action is warranted. I explained how his issues with absenteeism and tardiness impact me directly.
Oddly, he has at least three times as many continued cases as me and he just arrived. If he was having personal issues he should just take a leave of absence. Admittedly, he is not embraced and well loved but bullying occurs. When he showed up late, he offered to take his work back. As a courtesy, I offered the applicant a choice and a passing coworker said stay put. It also does not help that my office is now a very pleasant place to sit.

I don't like to switch cases because I come in early to prepare. The checks are done and I know who is walking in the door. Recently an annoying peer had to switch cases due to personal issues. I was slightly perturbed for two reasons. My case was fully prepared and ready for quick movement. The second case was totally unprepared and was far more labor and officer intensive. The supervisor is a wonderful human being and recognized it and defused it with a simple we have all been there remark. The attorney was very happy with the change and understood that my timetables would be off. His client would require extra time
roughly about 30 minutes. As his client had waited years, the extra time for a better venue is not a primary
concern.

I am starting to get annoyed by my peers on the subject of gays. We swear an oath to uphold the laws and are expected to be pros. As far as the religious arguments and morals, this concern is quite trivial as it is private behavior that impacts nobody other then willing participants. My peers regularly hear cases with people who drink and drive and commit criminal acts. I object to people who drink and drive. Innocent people die from impaired driving, but the morality of this is not pondered by the same people.

I had two lower ranked peers who were vexed by this issue. With the first a person asked how a gay man can father a child. I joked about the sperm cell joining the egg and cellular division. The person laughed and I got her to focus on the case specifics. The second peer was handled with lets return to case specifics and focus on the merits. Remaining focused is a key element of any job. When you watch MASH you see that skilled pros can joke a bit when they perform. If one is focused, competent and well trained most tasks should appear routine. The other bit is if you are not confident the public you serve will notice. This does not infer you should be standoffish. A simple quip , I think I have done this a time or two eases the atmosphere

Work place humor should stick to the situation and not be about the peer. Thus with the worker who dodged a heavy case some light humor is appropriate.He will go on to be an excellent peer. With the second case of excessive lateness I am not so certain. A top person asked me about training and getting things accomplished. I explained I can teach techniques but if the person does not want to improve it is wasted time.

With all these issues there is no excuse for bullying or making a peer into a pariah. It may be that the person with chronic lateness and attendance issues can not cut it. However, there is no excuse for emotional abuse
beyond the normal quips. Shame on the Miami Dolphins for allowing a poisonous work place to take a toll on an individual. Coaches and players who did not step in should be ashamed of themselves. Did you help yourselves as a team by making a peer into a pariah. It is one of those moments where people should look in the mirror and say look at yourselves and hang your heads in shame.

Tuesday, October 29, 2013

Making a pest of yourself

I don't care how the Cowboys spin this one Dez Bryant is a lunatic. Throwing temper tantrums un the sideline is not what winners do. Football is much like life. There is no room for crybabies and psychos when a job must be done. Some team will always take a chance on a talented head case.

These stories do not end well.

Monday, October 28, 2013

Grand Re-opening

My new and improved office will be officially open for business today. The response during down time was overwhelming and I received plenty of visits to the space. Every item that is on display was there but most were off display. In creating the new space the point of why have memorabilia if it can not be enjoyed.

I am working with the back wall. I was looking for a jungle landscape from Guyana or just an outstanding piece of Guyanese art. My efforts to find this have not been successful. On my next trip to Guyana I will try and find some local artist and place something Guyanese there. I am still looking at Nighthawks or prints of Dixville Notch or Smugglers Notch.

Oddly, I can not locate any prints of the classic Catskill Hotels. A nice painting or print of the Concord or Grossingers would have been perfect. The big classic Hotel period is gone save for Kutshers and I am one of the last who both worked and stayed in those grand hotels.

The top boss really loves the space. She visited and could not believe the effect. The smell of the office is controlled by air fresheners located in strategic places.

Saturday, October 26, 2013

Odds and ends

While I was out my office was the subject of a makeover. Other then the addition of small American flags every item in the office was there. Most were not visible to the public. The memorabilia was off display
for a while. The office is now known as the best in the area. The sound system is superior and one can enter off hours and just relax to the sounds of early 60's surf instrumentals.

I am looking at the far wall as the last part of the project. That section will hold a historical painting and two smaller landscapes one of Guyana and the other of the Catskills or Western Maine. The Vegan has been very helpful and narrowed the list of paintings. The reaction to Christina's World and The Death of General Wolfe in that space was very negative. 

The reaction to the new office is one of shock. My former boss noticed in 30 seconds. I got visitors from all over the unit and upper management. The cleaning person was caught sitting in my chair just to enjoy the space. What purpose is having memorabilia if it is stored in boxes and drawers. None of it is worth more then $70.00

In essence removing clutter was essential. Broken office equipment isn't going to fix itself. I also don.t like changing equipment. I kept my old keyboard, monitor and printer until IT changed them while I was away. The scanning gun was uniquely programmed to my needs. In fact now this programming is available to   all
that ask for it and can be done in as little as 15 minutes. I created the improvements by tinkering with the code books. 

The office has two air fresheners working in key locations. Someday I will find one that smells like hemlock forests instead of the non floral or lavender varieties. 

On a different note the Tranquil Sea has called many friends asking for a meeting. As these requests are frequent and annoying, I acceded to them. It will be a full family meeting. My position is unchanged, but I suppose a face to face meeting is not unreasonable. In my case I walked out and did not return or call. I did remain in regular contact with my daughter and met whatever obligations were required. When I visit the visits are around 30 minutes.
 

Friday, October 25, 2013

In the End Obama is Incompetent

Obama threw a temper tantrum and shut down the government to preserve Obamacare while the programs
problems could not be worked out. Obama could have conceded the obvious that the program is not ready.
Instead he dug in his heels closed parks and bullied opponents of this fiasco.

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Obscure Music

Oddly, one of the groups that I listen to has become popular among many of the 20 somethings at work. Early in the morning I usually listen to Surf or Garage Music while preparing cases. The Fabulous Wailers is a group that I listen to early in the morning and very late in the day.

They developed a distinctive sound in the Northwest. Long Tall Cool One is a song that I frequently play in the morning. It has developed its own fan base. The live version of I Idolize You with its blistering vocal by Gail Harris is well worth listening to.

Maybe in the future I will put a Junior Brown  or Eliminators CD in the mix.

Unfortunately, J&R Music up the block seems to be cutting back on the oldies. I used to love to drop by and pick up odd titles by ACE records like It Came From The Beach and so forth.

Now others are saying delay Obama care

His imperial majesty Obama stated no negotiations to delay the implementation of the debacle known as Obamacare. Now we have Democrats  seeking to delay this monstrosity.

Wait didn't the Obama administration dig their feet in shut down the government to avoid this.It seems Ted Cruz is smarter then Obama.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Be a nice guy

Many times it is the little things we do that make a difference in lives. I was working with a person with terminal illness. The doctor gave him about three months. I pondered why he was in my office. He said I invested thirteen years in this and the finish line is near. I made the experience light and sunny. His sister thanked me and said officer this is the first time he has laughed in months. 

The thing is that we aren't laughing at someone. We are laughing together at related experiences. My boss heard the exchange and stated it was memorable. We did everything in our power to make his experience positive.

At the end of the interview the applicant thanked me. My boss and the attorney said that was a truly memorable experience. I reminded them that sometimes we are lucky to get a great supporting role in a larger play.  The secret is that sometimes the public servant should thank the applicant for sharing special moments in their lives.

Understanding how to make those moments special is good public service. 


Tuesday, October 22, 2013

Religion on Others Dime

Being Frum means you are really financially ignorant. You send your kids to private schools you can't afford.
When they complete their studies they go to Israel for two years to study religion while their parents mooch off other relatives.

In essence not only has my brothers wife failed to work for two decades. This religious sloth is draining my inheritance because these clowns mooch from my parents.

Instead of grasping that her sloth is impacting me I get reminded I was unemployed for a stretch 12 years ago. That was almost ten years ago. I also did not dip into other peoples pockets or possessions. Being frum means you can claim fake moral high ground for your failings and abnormal behavior.

Essentially, this deranged lifestyle of sloth is at my expense and there is no grasp that this entitlement is wrong.For my brother taking another car after this is a divine right,

Of course my brothers wife states that if I hate her I shouldn't take it out on my brother. Her sloth has hit me in the pocket on multiple levels and my brother has condoned it and made no effort to be financially responsible.

Monday, October 21, 2013

Clarification

I want to point out there is some confusion over my relationship to the Orthodox Community. I have never been Orthodox or religiously observant. My family decided to become Orthodox when I was seven. I did not accept this and rebelled to gain my freedom. I am familiar with the customs as I was educated in this community took part in functions and so forth. My brother is an Orthodox pulpit Rabbi and if he and family were not in my face I would be fine.

I am not religious by nature. I am not an atheist. Rather, I don't really think about theology. I have disdain for organized faith and live by my own set of ethics. My ethics are similar to a rant from John Wayne in the Shootist. I respect others ( commies excepted) and their possessions and demand the same. I don't look for trouble, but if you  start a fight I will end it. I expect nothing and ask for even less. Character is something you are born with and respect is earned. You come into the world alone and naked and you leave the same way. In between all you have is your name. How you live your life determines the worth of that name.

I quit pretending I was a member of the community long ago.

I can't believe this crap

It is 2AM on a school night and my brothers family is still here. They never go home because this lunatic procrastinates and just bugs the shit out of everyone. They claim the kid has Epstein Barr because she falls asleep all the time in school. The real issue is having an idiot for a parent.

She had the whole day to start laundry but started six loads at 6:00. I tried to go to sleep and she started jabbering away on the phone next door two flights up. Normally, I would sleep next to the washing machine to avoid this moron.

I am annoyed by my family who just doesn't get it. The car isn't worth much money and I seldom drive it. However, this is my choice and is not their business. However, I have to give my brother my car because he is forever broke because his wife won't work. Why should I be out my car because you won't work.

Her thinking as well as that of my family is why this condition is not treated. A normal person says okay sorry but I am doing this. They do not turn around and attack the person they just extorted a handout from. The reason my nephew was stuck here last summer was he had a summer job but his mother procrastinated and yammered until nothing was available. I was stuck with them for 13 weeks.

I was going to buy another car, but my brother said we will do this all over again. Of course he is right and this is annoying. The reason the car is still around is because I maintained it. I am annoyed that whatever down on their luck relative borrowed my car.

This idiot has her own family, but she never seems to be by other relatives. The reason is obvious that she is so annoying that they can't stand her.

I have few hopes that she will do well in vocational therapy or any other sort of therapy. She is never wrong
and everyone else has the issues. Funny, but whatever issues I have one can count on me to wake up at 4:00
get prepared walk a mile and make a 5:02 bus. I do it rain or shine. On the job one can count on a solid days production each and every time. No matter how bad things are I make my deadlines. No matter what happens one can count on me getting it done each and every day.

I get the bus and the driver looks at me and says house guests. I look and ask how did you know. He says you are usually bright and cheery and joke in the morning but... Then I get to work and my clerk notices and says " They're back". I respond how did you know. He tells me " Normally you have cheery music on but you are paying the blues". My coworkers notice that I am not joking and sometimes my hands shake. I go to my second home and just by my order the waiter knows. I never eat pork unless my brother is here with his messed up wife.

I honestly considered going to Iraq to get away from these visits. My parents just don't get why I am so annoyed and she will be going home soon. She never does leave and finds an excuse to return again and again.

My brother is a nice guy with a soft heart. It is not in his nature to just say enough shape up. He has endured this for twenty plus years. He works three jobs because she can't work one and the Yeshiva bills don't wait.
Long ago I would have ended the relationship. I have done so many times in my time for far less then this.

The religion was a cover for mental illness. Much of frummie culture does cover or provide excuses for this type of loser behavior. Being frum limits job choices. It is not a matter of taking two holidays but one must leave early for the Sabbath for half of the year. Add in scores of holidays and employers will not put up with this. Even in NYC where this kind is common, this type works in relatively a few places. In the IRS there are a plenty of frum types. In my agency with hundreds of jobs we have a few Jewish officers and no clerks. We had a disabled clerk with severe behavioral issues who was fired. If the reports were true this was a rare case of termination for cause.

If the behaviors were done by an under privileged type professionals would recognize it immediately. The 24/7 cell phone internet bit and the always being late. The inability to follow directions or prioritize things at work. The inability to get along with any supervisor at any job. These are classic pathologies familiar to people who work with addicted types. Of course because the patient is frum we keep giving the benefit of the doubt and holding our tongues.

Now my brother and I have had a huge fight caused by his wife's behavior. She knows this and doesn't understand why I asked to terminate our relationship. I told her that her behavior is driving me up a wall and I can't take it anymore. My brother has to put up with it, but I won't. I openly admit I despise her. I guess in some ways I behave like the clod from Doc Martin.Normally, people respond I don't really hate you to this line. In my case I have stopped lying to myself and others.

Rather then grasp her problems she attacks me. I have had a few failed relationships, but that isn't the issue.
The issue is why are you here every second and get a job. She yammers on and goes on the attack how my family puts up with me. Funny, I earn a living and talk to very few of them. I had a rough patch twelve years back. However, I took whatever jobs I could find and endured abuse that was frightening. However, I was at my current job nearly ten years. I had jobs in the fashion industry for five years three times and one of the departures was due to bankruptcy. My former rough stretch is not the issue as I did have ample history of being with multiple employers for more than five years.

The term for this is passive aggressive. She manipulates through procrastination, makes herself into the victim and points the finger everywhere else.  On the job her issues with punctuality, decisiveness and toxic victimology make her an employee you don't want and we have seen the results.

In my days as an executive this is what you want

1) Reliable punctual people
2) Follow directions
3) Team players

In essence as this person is neither punctual nor reliable even a job that would tailor itself to all the religious quirks would not put up with her for long. I seriously doubt she can follow the simplest of direction due to procrastination issues and indecisveness.

For twenty years I held my tongue. My parents and other relatives have not made things better by making excuses. She can't work she is disabled. She knows she has problems. The issue is now her problems are my problems and I am out a car. The reality is I can't buy another because in a few months we will be doing this all over again.






Sunday, October 20, 2013

After 20 Years

I loathe my sister in law. 90% of the fights with my brother are caused by her idiotic habits and mental issues. She hides behind the religious pious bull shit and hasn't worked in twenty years. Beaky you don't use your car. How about you get off your ass and buy your own car.

On a school night she starts a laundry at 8:00 pm and will leave with her daughter at 2AM. Six weeks to buy a single plane ticket.

Then of course her issues are messing me up and she turns shit around. I can't take it anymore. Why is her inability to function my problem. The answer everyone says is you didn't drive the car and its work 3,000.
The answer is get a (^%^(& job and stop %^&*(^(*)& my life. I don't want anything to do with my brother until this asshole gets her shit together. Baruch hashem doesn't cut it when you keep messing up and can't think straight.

Cultural Retardation

This occurs when people fail to grasp how others live. Its poster children are clueless morons around you who are so self centered they fail to grasp how others live.

In the news we have seen the rant of a spoiled kid the the New School. The New School is an Academic Gulag. The rant of this baboon has shown that Marxist clowns can not brainwash someone who has no brains to begin with. Alternately, class warfare diatribes are wasted on someone with no class.

A supervisor at work who looked with disbelief that poor people rent a bed for eight hours. Obviously working with people from poor slums and living in NYC has not provided enough contact with the unwashed massed to grasp how they live.

Dimwit frummies who think that Rabbis playing Tony Soprano for huge sums of cash are misunderstood community pillars. Dimwit frummies who blame and abuse the family of a child abuse victim for turning her abuser in.

In order to grow as a person one must grasp there are alternatives. Of course Marxist morons usually have no contact with actual poor people but feign moral authority to speak for them.

Final Rant

Getting rid of a sibling is a serious choice. It is a choice I understand and have done with malice and no regrets. Those who know the parties in question need to understand this has been building for a while and the last straw was my car.

My brother is a loser and a disgrace on all levels. He is a whimp who hides behind his faith and his wife's uselessness to mooch off others. He was not born a loser and incompetent but has gone through great lengths to become so. He lives in a fantasy world that is as real as dungeons and dragons. Rabbis that engage in criminal activities are victims. My moron son will become an actuary. My lazy wife is perfectly fine. I look at him and am embarrassed at his cultural retardation. He might read a book if it had pictures and beyond religious texts is a functional illiterate. 

My sister in law is a low life moron. Her fake pious act is an excuse to get out of working for a living. She might observe the faith, but it is only as a crutch to avoid gainful employment. I have more respect for crack addict hookers who at least earn a living then her. She has not been employed in 25 years Baruch Hashem and has raised two messed up useless kids. My parents except all kinds of excuses claiming she can not work. She can't work, because she doesn't want to work. Why should she when she can live the life of a Frummie Ghetto Hoochie. She has time management issues and a rotten personality. A cell phone is always attached to her ear. Long term planning is impossible for someone who has an Olympic Gold Medal in uselessness. Six weeks to buy a plane ticket. Watching her do mundane tasks is like watching a punch line in how many of X does it take to screw in a light bulb Funny it took Israel Six days to win a war. If this relative was in charge everyone would be in the sea, baruch hashem.

She has finally grasped after years of cluelessness that I despise her. She was waiting for me to say I don't hate her in one of my fights with my brother. My response was now that we have this covered... It is impossible not to hate this obnoxious lazy useless imbecile. She knows everything, except how to get a job
and to accomplish the most simple of tasks. You tell her to leave you alone and she doesn't listen. She refuses to get a job or go for help and I am out of a car and this is peachy.

You can easily afford another one or you can borrow mine another relative says. What they fail to see is why must I be burdened by sloth. She wants another car go out and buy one. The way this crew treats cars it will be totaled in a year or less. They would repeat this process again and again. I should not have to give up my car because she refuses to work.

My nephew is a clueless moron and a certified loser. Three years of Yeshiva and pipe dreams of being an actuary. His mathematical aptitude is nowhere near that level. His low IQ and lack of drive might qualify him to be an employee in a very low level of customer service. He has the leadership and charisma of a paper towel. You mean you won't come to my wedding ....You mean you won't visit... He fails to grasp that I despise them and want no part of frummie life.

My nice is more problematic. She is likely to be a serial ex-wife but has vestiges of intelligence and potential for not being totally useless. There is much of my history beyond her ability to understand. I didn't rebel against anything and I am not lost. I was pulled into a world I wanted nothing to do with. I never accepted it and rebelled for years to be returned to the secular world. My desire to live a secular life was viewed as disturbed thinking. I never accepted or wanted to be a part of the Frum community. I left after Junior high and went to a small secular private school. I was guilted into returning to Yeahiva for one semester and left for good never to return. I am sorry you are not culturally aware to grasp some people reject frumkheit.


Saturday, October 19, 2013

The End

I have decided to terminate the relationship with my brother and his family. I am disgusted by their sick lifestyle of pious sloth. The final straw was my car. True I didn't use it but that was my right. His wife has not worked for 25 years and he needs a vehicle. His wife's sloth is now costing me a vehicle. I can buy another car in seconds, but the process will repeat itself. Being frum means you get to take other people's possessions to subsidize sloth and excuses.

Over the next few days I will make the split complete. I will convert to another faith so that I can not be buried near him. Now I understand this cuts me off from my familial history and I am okay. On my next trip abroad I will purchase a resting place there. I am not bound by traditions and history. I write my own path and traditions. The resting place will only be known to one relative who can be trusted and compensated to respect my wishes.

I will still identify with my heritage, but want to erase all connections to family that I consider a personal disgrace. The conversion is not because I believe or embrace other ideals. It is done solely to get me as far away from frummies as possible.

In the end my car is of no great importance. It is a small price to pay for one's freedom. It will keep me out of all family functions and events. A car has a monetary value. Freedom from pious self important relatives is priceless.

As Frummies say if we divide a car... Don't divide the car take it get the F^(*^&() away from me and never talk to me again.

Rename the Redskins the Washington Hacks

Instead of having a picture of a noble Indian warrior on their helmet let the Washington football team wear the image of public service under Obama Lois Lerner on their helmet. Lois Lerner's image is scarier then most Halloween attire.

It is the sense of entitlement

The Frummies are here yet again. The excuse this time is their son is going to Yeshiva to study for year three.  God forbid anyone other then me should go to work. It doesn't matter that money is tight because God will find a way, usually by sponging. The excuse was, he is going back in between the holidays six weeks ago.

My parents are less then useful with this act. You don't understand the wife is disabled and she is not mentally fit to work due to time management issues. She isn't going to get help because she doesn't think anything is wrong. Wandering through life aimlessly from one idiotic gathering and sponging to subsidize this boorish piety is not acceptable.

The son has never done much beyond his religious studies. The current pipedream is that he is going to be an actuary. He shows zero talent in this area and has never spent moments working outside the Frummie world. He does not grasp how real people live. More realistic is that he is going to marry a butt ugly woman and have kids he can't afford. He will teach in a school as his charisma is somewhere between that of a tennis ball and a goldfish and make nothing. The daughter is more intelligent, but is obnoxious and is headed for a career as a frummy ex wife from about three husbands. Each marriage will be progressively worse. Whatever education she gets will be wasted as she won't be able to work normal hours and needs a litany of holidays.

What annoys me is my brother thinks we need quality time and I like him and his Frummy Adams family. Even before I became a federal officer his annoying visits made my blood boil. I endured them and was OK, but two summers ago when he stayed the whole summer ended the relationship. The reason this happened was his useless wife messed up his sons summer plans and it became my problem for thirteen weeks of hell.
Frummies like natural disasters don't plan. They walk around in a self righteous fog just sponging off of others.

The latest relaxation is his shock and dismay that several of his rabinical clown friends were arrested in the FBI raids. They are such wonderful pillars of the community who arrange beatings for profit to force husbands to provide a religious divorce. This garbage has gone on for years and the clueless morons are so upset their friend may actually serve jail time with commoners. Maybe in jail he might have to do manual labor that is beneath the lazy scholars.

I went through this garbage with Sunbeam. It is important to look pious for the sake of others. In this world a man who looks pious on the outside and feigns being ethical is more important then actual ethics. Sorry, but I am a man and refuse to let others determine how I live. My ethics are miles above the actual ethics of frummies. I bust my behind at work and treat those that I serve with respect and a sense of fairness. When I am compensated there is no excuse for not giving 100% or taking ethical short cuts.

The reality is few Frummies measure up to the standards of conduct that govern my life each and every day.
I do not walk around in a religious stupor avoiding work and sponging off others. I could care less what the community or anyone else thinks. I live my life and walk the path I choose, because I am not bound by anything other then the laws of the USA and my own sense of ethics. For the frummy being outwardly pious while privately being less then ethical is peachy.

What annoys me about the frummies is not the money or possesions they mooch. What annoys me is their sense of entitlement when imposing on others. They seem to think because they are pious that life and others owe them something. They think nothing of imposing their lifestyle on others and avoid work at all costs. They think they are better then other people and that some of us are born to serve them.

In the world of Beakerkin hard work and responsibility mean more then outward signs of piety. I have more respect for a hard working truck drivers then these boorish frummies with their hands out. I work hard for my possessions, why should I give up my car to my brother who is broke and has a wife that doesn't work.
He says you don't use that car and I need it work and to function. I point out his wife hasn't worked in 25 years and does not function. How about telling her to work like the rest of us. I then get a lecture about respecting his wife. He fails to grasp his wife's refusal to work is now my problem. He cries victim to family members and I am out a car to essentially shut him up. I won't buy another car as he will do this again and again. Of course getting his wife to go to work is unreasonable. Somehow people with actual handicaps do this each and every day.

I live by a simple code. Life owes you nothing. Work hard because to do so is to cheat yourself. Obey the laws of the United States and ask for nothing in return.



Friday, October 18, 2013

Vote on your next name change for Warren Wilhelm

Our soon to be elected mayor has had more names then professional criminals and done a fraction of the actual work of actual career criminals.

Lets Propose new names for the new mayor

Chairman Stupid
Che Lazy
First Citizen Couch Potato
Bin Marx
Comrade Incoherent
Throwing Bull
Fidel Tietelbaum
Mao Soprano
Guido Trotsky
Ho Che Chomsky
Clepto Claus
Vladamir Fudd
Grand Master Marxist Moron
LL Cool Clod

At least David Dinkins was living on planet earth.

I can just see Gomer Di Blassio leading a band of Faux hipster revolutionaries ranting on about Webolution and Socialist Webolution between hits of wine coolers.

Does each new alias of Warren Wilhelm get a vote?
Has he figured out Col Klink does not work at the NYPD?

And you thought A Rod needed the performance enhancers for baseball

It would seem that A Rod might have needed the performance enhancers to enable him to enjoy nights with hired hookers. Why he would need to do this when he has scores of celebrity women and air headed groupies available remains unknown.

As usual A Rod claims his innocence.

I wish A Rod would take his millions and just enjoy the rest of his life away from the media. Even if he wins his case the constant media and me first bit is way too annoying.

Mass Stupidity and media malfeasence

The media loves to hype the one or two stupid guys in a Tea Party crowd. One nut says Obama put down the Koran and another brings a Confederate flag and the entire TEA party movement is racist. Funny, but we regularly see the Obama approved OWS carry Soviet Flags, engage in mass acts of crime and engage in rhetoric clearly aimed at Jews that would come right out of 1940's Nazi rallies and engage in active terrorist plots and the media spins the opposite story.

The fact remains that the Obama administration has used the IRS to target political opponents in  direct violation of the law. The actions of Lois Lerner and others are typical of the huge ethical lapses that exceed anything imagined by Richard Nixon.

Those on the left like to lecture us about the first amendment when they attend communist led and organized 
protests against GOP administrations. Move On  hysterically has called the actions of the GOP treasonous and has called for arrests. These calls are at the heart of the leftist tendency towards fascism and ethical lapses that are at the center of the moral and mental rot required to be a leftist.

The media portrays the TEA party as a bunch of unhinged lunatics. Funny, but I don't know of any TEA party members who have multiple name changes and have spouses that change sexual orientation on call. I don't recall Tea Party members honeymooning in Cuba and participating in Revolutionary Tourism on the dime of hostile foreign governments. I don't recall Warren Wilhelm, Bill Di Blassio or whatever he calls himself showing any concern for Indians abused by his Sandinista friends. I don't recall any TEA Party people  who have photographs where they look like Chia pets on LSD with head injuries.
 
 The people in the TEA Party unlike Barak Obama have been gainfully employed on real jobs. None of the ones I met attended elite Prep schools and universities based on combinations of family ties and affirmative action programs. The ones I know don't vacation in Martha's Vineyard waxing about the price of Arugula at Whole Foods or rush off to endless golf games.

Of course the media elite lecture us about the alleged racism of the TEA Party but I recall a guy talking about 9-9-9 leading the polls. Cain unlike Obama has been gainfully employed and has lived in Black neighborhoods The media suddenly discovered sexual harassment might be an issue, unless your name is Clinton. The evidence against Cain was weak compared to mountains of evidence against Clinton. You can even get voted into office when you drive off a bridge in a drunken stupor and a woman dies if the media elite protect you.

Millions are underemployed or uemployed as a direct consequence of Obamacare. The administration and media have condoned the abuse of political opponents of the Obama policies in direct violation of the laws of the United States.At a certain point even the dumbest grasp they are paying more for health care and receive less. The service in my doctors office was excellent and now it is replaced by wonderfully efficient DMV or
IRS agents dressed up like Spock line dancing. Those of us who have had real lives and have been gainfully 
employed ( unlike Obama, Di Blassio, Wiener or Bill Clinton) are familiar with the customer service found at the DMV, IRS or Social Security office. 

Now on top of all this other misery Obama wants to legalize people who knowingly violated the immigration laws of the United States. They can join the rest of us in the never ending search for jobs that don't exist and ger on line at doctors office while political hacks line dance and feign they are overworked.

Remember the words of John Paul Jones. Unlike lefties the rest of us do not engage in criminal acts so the Obama minions at federal agencies can feel free to violate our rights, violate the laws of the USA and make a mockery out of the concept of Public Service.

  
  

Return of the Frummies

The planets most annoying house guests are back again. The promise that their son would return to his religious studies right after the holidays went up in smoke. He is finally going allegedly this week. Frummies don't plan ahead.

The Frummies were here yesterday night. How and why they were here instead of being home or near home on a school night is typical. They live irresponsibly and are incapable of maintaining focused lives. Obviously some moron they meet in passing had a family function and they must attend.

It has been over twenty years since my sister in law has been gainfully employed. Of course I could easily arrange factory work, but this is beneath frummies who need make every excuse not to work and think manual labor is beneath them. Meanwhile it is easier to sponge off relatives and annoy them with their inept and insane lifestyle.

There are those who are prejudiced  against gays. Funny, a gay house guest doesn't demand special food
disrupt everyone's lives with their lifestyle quirks. Even criminals steal and don't prolong the sponging for decades. This holier then thou act is a cover for a lifestyle of laziness and sponging off others.

Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Be back on Friday or Saturday

My computer is in the shop and I got hit hard by hackers. As I don't do any commerce on line or connect to work via my personal PC this was wasted efforts. My computer will be scrubbed by world class experts and reloaded. As I only blog, read emails and watch you tube videos this is quite easy.

I may have the computer altered for overseas duty. This could mean a return to Guyana or elsewhere. I prefer to alter the computer then to alter my phone. Although renting a phone locally or using a "burn phone" is always an option. The last time I went abroad I communicated with coworkers at regular intervals.

Thursday, October 10, 2013

Wednesday, October 09, 2013

Happy Birthday Sprite

I spent some time with my daughter yesterday. I prefer to talk over the phone and keep my distance from the house. Her adult sister in law does a great job raising her and I keep out of day to day matters. Unfortunately, the little dog detected my presence dropping of birthday gifts and I spent some quality time with my daughter, grand daughter and the little dog.  I miss them very much and am careful to not mention or discuss the Tranquil Sea. My daughter showed me some family photos and part of her yearns for those earlier times.

When I leave her it is always with a heavy heart. However, I am lucky her adult sister in law has done such a wonderful job raising her with my financial support.

I am fortunate to have such a good kid. I miss the family, but it is best to keep the visits short and infrequent.