Wednesday, April 23, 2014

Doesn't take much for family fun

On my way through a Walmart I picked up a small lawn troll set. I intended to bring it to the office to live out my fantasy of creating a Chia lawn with doll house chairs in my office. My daughter fancied the set and we will be creating something together. Yes it will be tacky, but it is fun that we can share together. I will go to the hardware store and look for some peat moss and small flowers.

Who knew an after thought would create family fun.

Someday I still want to create a bonsai lawn with a lounge chair and in size NY Post and Diet Mountain Dew six pack. My creation will be called beakerkin's retirement fantasy. Perhaps a small radio would be there. An old tape of classic Paul Harvey bits and Oldies music should be in the work of art.

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

Washed Up at 24

The NY Giants took a chance with Will Hill. His first suspension for aderall  was a mistake by the NFL. This medication was legitimately prescribed by  a medical professional. It does not enhance performance. The other suspensions were deserved and no doubt his career is over in a flash.

The NFL was incorrect in its initial action but Hill deserves the consequences. No doubt some team will give him a chance again. Drug addiction is a sickness and treatments are costly and not guaranteed. 

Sadly, if a person like Will Hill with a world class organization can't get himself clean, how do regular folks get by.

There are no easy answers. Will Hill let down his team mates and his career is over almost without highlights.

Sunday, April 20, 2014

Deal With it

I will be representing Guyana at the office open house. When the folks upstairs asked me to participate they did not expect me to represent Guyana. In general I don't participate in these events, but the chance to add to my legend as Extra Crispy Persaud is too funny.

Watching Forrrest Gump, where even slow Americans punch out Commies. Go Forrest go punch out those lefties. It is even better than watching John Wayne knock out commies in Big Jim McClain.

A public service to hack writers

We interrupt  this holiday to talk about piss poor creations. Although, I may disagree with the Duck he has taken the time and effort to craft a persona. This is not to difficult as there is an actual bio behind the blather.

When one deals with a troll one gets no bio and a melange of ignorant remarks.

A well crafted persona should have depth and substance. For example, I could create a persona Narine, a Guyanese Hindu logistics person. The fact that I worked the vocation in question and am fairly familiar with this culture would make pulling it off easy. However, as my bio has never changed, I have neither the desire nor the inclination to craft such a persona.

Oddly, at various points in my blogging history I have been accused of being an Assyrian or Copt impersonating a Jew. I have been called a gay rights militant.  The critique by some commies was that I hide my Judaism to brainwash non-Jews like AOW, Mr. Beamish and the late Dr. Yeagley into supporting Israel.
The new critique based upon my bio is that I am a self hating Jew. Other lefties criticize my choice of romantic partners as not inclusive enough.

Sorry, but my bio hasn't changed because Beakerkin is merely a pen name.

At least provide your troll handles with a bio cumwads.

The Beak as Uncle

One can tell quite a bit from a limited meeting, In a previous meeting I summed up a previous boyfriend as a cheap Shaggy clone in seconds. The latest clown is severely disturbed, does not make eye contact nor has the ability to interact socially. This one is a well bred psycho loser. He is a sad improvement from a pathetic previous relationship.

In his case he grasps assholes should not talk.

Saturday, April 19, 2014

Grandfather again

I will be a grandfather again. I do enjoy a loving relationship with my grandchild and my daughter in law. In the end the time spent as a father and grandfather are the best moments.

Not Understanding Individualism

I work with a close friend who is an elite university graduate from a Muslim country. What still amazes me is his inability to understand individualism. He falls back at each time, but you are Jewish.

The fact that I am Jewish in ancestry does not bind me to a preset political positions. He points out that I would never date a Muslim woman. This might sound amusing except that the person saying it has married a person from his own country. Similarly, when I started a relationship with Sunbeam there were those who were upset I did not date a Haitian  woman first. I don't understand where these obsessions with my private life comes from. However, my tastes are quite eclectic and more varied then those of my critics.

I am not bound by tradition to practice a faith. Unlike far left phonies I have more then a passing familiarity with the faith that they are completely ignorant of. This does not prevent them from screaming I am a Jooo
outraged by whatever. Actually those lefties never were Jews. They are Marxist drone followers of a death cult.

I am free to define my political views with the same intellectual freedom as the next person. I find it odd that this person does not grasp this basic concept of Americanism. There are those who blame his country of origin. I blame the University Intellectual Gulag that imposes far left conformity at the expense of critical thinking.

But He Wanted to Be A Hero

The point of public service is public service. Unfortunately, there are those who seek to become heroes at the expense of the public. The essence of public service is the person across the desk. When it becomes
about you then the essence of public service is lost.

Unfortunately, some serve for entirely the wrong reasons.

Tuesday, April 15, 2014

More Jeff Bezos jokes

Sticking with the theme of silly publicity stories

6) Bezos asks the Psychiatric association to name a mental health disorder after him. Biden has a planet named after him but Bezos wants a mental health malady...
7) Bezos creates Amazon extraterrestrial. His real interest in space is a cheap ploy to get new Amazon customers.
8) Bezos creates Amazon family. Unhappy with your family no problem. You can use Amazon to recast the roles of your annoying relatives. Say goodbye to loud and boorish cousin Milton. You can recast these relations using Amazon family. Replace loud cousin Milton with Thomas who does not speak a language you can understand.
9) Bezos considers creating a new application for those of us with difficult life choices. Ever wonder what type of wine goes with possum hit by a Volvo ask Amazon life coach. Ever wonder how to get your husband to put down the toilet seat or ask for directions ask the Amazon life coach app.
10) Bezos creates an Amazon Prime Afterlife Option. Imagine long after you are gone an app to reproduce your spending patters into eternity or however long it takes your actual family to consider you are deceased.

Now this is all in good clean fun. I ask that anyone who wishes to create their own Bezos jokes keep them in good taste. We will not publish jokes making fun of a person based on his physical appearance or ethnicity.
The sad part is the real Bezos might actually get some ideas from these jokes and get motivated to find ways to generate new revenue.

Not a fan of Jeff Bezos

I am not a fan of the cult of the egomaniac Jeff Bezos and the 24/7 publicity machine. Examples of this endless desire for non stop publicity are the news stories about drones and paying employees chump change to quit. This egomaniac should be rife for all types of comedic skewering.

As Bezos is fond of insane self promotion.

1) Bezos ponders asking American to chip in 25 cents each to get him to quit placing these stupid stories in the newspaper
2) Bezos prints a special edition of a Christmas Carol where Scrooge is renamed Jeff Bezos
3) Bezos considers the possibility of the creation of robots to spray bathrooms fouled by people whose movements could be considered a cross between a landfill and rotting flesh
4) Bezos creates Amazonian apps to allow tech nerds without a life a chance to have an actual social interaction.
5) Bezos buys a circus so he can hang out with clowns.

Monday, April 14, 2014

Got out in time

Vermont is about to become the Mecca for high taxation. No doubt had I remained this latest scam involving single payer would be at my doorstep. Even though I was on assignment there for three years, I did pay NYC taxes and had NY health care options. 

No doubt the snowbirds and transplants who relocated to VT and elect deranged socialist lunatics are now going to have to pay for their insanity. How many of them leave for NH or upstate NY remains unknown.

Saturday, April 12, 2014

Goodbye J&R

It is with great sadness that this crusty New Yorker conveys this. I should have seen this coming. First the oldies section disappeared, then the records. There are those that love Amazon and the turd of a CEO Jeff Bezos. The factories where the workers assemble the orders are as close to sweat shops as one get.

I miss the old dusty book and record stores. No doubt there are those who miss other forgotten parts of our life like diners with a competent soda jerk. Actually, this is a lost art and I still craft an oldie or two for the daughter upon request.

I miss the mom and pop stores and the small merchant. The days of knowing the guy who ran the hardware store or pharmacy are a thing of the past. We are not better as a society when local institutions die and are replaced by yet another frozen yogurt place or endless sandwich shops. If you have the luck of living in NYC Lennys is the apex of this genre and Potbelly is acceptable. On principle I will not eat in a Subway where the food is dreadful.

I will remember the joy of hunting for gems in J&R. Finding that rare nugget was always a joy that a person of my age will remember.