Archie Beakerkin: I wish you would stop placing Malt Liquor in the fridge. It gives that jerk Uptown Jefferson an excuse to come in and raid my refrigerator. He is a Golberg's grocery demandng that they sell Black hair care products.
TMW: Be nice Archie, Uptown is our nieghbor. You wouldn't want him to feel unwelcome in our home.
Archie: Am I miscommmunicating, the man is rude and a freeloader.
Ducky: Your real problem with him is because he is black.
Archie: He spends more time in my refrigerator than I do. The other day we ran out of Shapiro's Wine but there was plenty of Malt Liquor. He even eats all the bagels and Hebrew National products.
Speaking of freeloaders, I want you to stop having sex with my daughter and get a real job.
Ducky: Archie we are married. I got a certificate from city hall
TMW: Archie he is married to our daughter.
Archie: Let me see that. Of all the man my little girl could have married she picks an unemployable Commie PInko who watches art films. When are you going to get a real job like the rest of us.
TMW we are out of Hebrew National and no Miracle Whip.
TMW: Ducky said we should use Shofar products instead as the term Hebrew National is racist. Miracle Whip could be offensive to aethiests or people who are into S&M. Spic
and Span is...........
Archie: TMW why do you listen to the Commie Freeloader.
TMW: It is easier to shut him up.
Archie: Where is my Aunt Jemima Syrup.
Ducky: Aunt Jemimah is a racist term only appropriate when I use it to describe Condi Rice.
Archie: Aunt Jemimah is a beloved woman who sells products and is gainfully employed.
Ducky: She is a racist symbol of corporate greed.
Beakerambo: Me Mi Mi Me Huh????
Archie: You see my cousin. He looks like a freak can't string together a sentence and makes a living selling action figures and luchboxes. I wish he would stop sleeping with married women but he should be your role model.
Uptown: Your cousin is a mulato just look at the Don King hair and that is ebonics.
Beakerambo: Mi me mee meep Moronics.
Archie: What are you talking about? He has the family nose and has even been blood tested. His own parents didn't believe he was their kid. Apparently, smoking pot does have an effect on your kids.
Beakerambo: Mi me meeep %^%^% you Me
TMW: Archie you hurt your Cousins feelings.
Ducky: Can't you see that Beakerambo is exploited. He generates huge proffits and gets pennies on the dollar.
Beakerambo: Me meee meep Pinko. Me mmmeee meeep Out of here.
TMW: You all should be ashamed of yourselves picking on Beakerambo.
Archie: Well this is a first someone came into the house without raiding the refrigerator.
Beakerambo: Me me meep Forgot. Meep meepp me Thank you
Archie: Oh will you look at that he made off with my Pastami on Rye and Knish.
Beakerambo: Me mi meeep me
TMW: Well he did leave a gift.
Archie: I am not taking a Beakerambo lunchbox to work.
Uptown: Afraid to let your coworkers know you have a black cousin?
Archie: Beakerambo is not Black he is incoherent.
Ducky: That is not incoherence its ebonics.
Archie: Thats is TMW we are going out for dinner. Its the only way we can get pece and quiet around here.