Thursday, June 02, 2005

9-11 Dreams, Loss and Patience

This will be a different post then my readers are used to . There will be no bombstic politics. There will be no fighting or antisemitic idiots.

Most of you who have read this know I am a witness to 9-11. I am also a survivor of WTC 93. I do not enjoy talking about the horrors I saw. The exception was when I was with sailors last week .They wanted to know my story and where I was . Who am I to deny heros the reason they are fighting. I told them I am no hero just a witness to a horrible event . Every day goes by and I remember the images that I pray none of you see and the smell of death eerie and haunting.

The WTC was a part of my life I passed through there each and every day with my late
friend Big Bad Larry Yeah Yeah. We would eat at an overpriced bakery and meet up with coworkers Booker and Winston. Big Bad Larry did not die on 9-11 . He passed away of a stroke at 45 way too young.

Every time I pass the WTC there is a hole in the life of this NYC resident. I spoke of the perfidity of the left stabing America and at that time I knew my life had changed. I was no longer the happy go lucky man I was before. My mission was to get involved any way I could. I am too old to join the military but there are other options.

I took a federal test and waited through impossible hurdles my life was turned upside down. I waited through a score of dead end Jobs and impossible working conditions for this day. I lost relationships as nobody ever believed in my dream.
My dream came true a few hours ago and I will be off to due my part . People thought
this day would never come. I had no idea that the call to give my urine last week portended my call.

I consider it an honor to serve my country. Each and every day I serve is dedicated to the memory of those less fortunate. I will remember the brave look of the NYFD as they ran into action as I ran for my life. I will remember the people who I saw fall
from the sky and hit. I will remember the smoke and confusion in 93.

There is an anti-semitic person that writes about the "Fascist Judea American Neocon
War on Terror Fraud". This war is no fraud to me and I was there. Do not talk to me about Chicken Hawks as I am doing my part but it will be in the USA. Maybe this is a game to you leftist vermin by the Beak doesn't play that tune. This is real and I was there for the opening Salvo. Do not tell me about exagerated threats you didn't live through this twice.

Never forget why we are fighting, my city was attacked twice and there are scores of other attacks overseas. My enemy thinks of 72 vigins but I think of my nieces and nephews and the world they will inherit. I cherish life and love and the wonderful friends .This is a battle between love and hate on some levels.

I would like to thank my blog band of Brothers . Warren your courage and fire is an inspiration to me. Jason you have an amazing blog. Big Bubba I wish you were around
anywhere I hang my hat your home. Always on the Watch and Kajando you guys are great.
Esther you are beauty and class personified. Pam you are the toughest fighter our cause has. Adam Guri you have excellent potential and the most underated blog on the net. JB of Citzcom you are a classy man and a pro. Last but never Least is Mr Beamish
who rocks and keeps it simple. He makes the complex simple and that is a gift along with his sense of humor.

B, Kafkaesq, Bum From Jersey we may not always agree but the blog is always entertaining.

I will continue blogging but at a slower pace.

To my enemies that claim not to read this site. I am doing what I believe in and am
proud to serve. You can take your anti- semitic marxist pipe dreams and rot. History will judge you and your kind and it will not be kind.


bum from jersey said...

oh man. well, first congrats. what is your new job? all i could guess from your post was that you won't be working in the military.

second, i must admit i am not too fond of ny. not because of anything that happened but as a new jerseyian, i think new jersey gets overshadowed sometimes by new york. BUT like you, my heart skips a beat when i look at the skyline and see two buildings missing. i may be young but i have seen the skyline enough times to not ever get used to what i see now and probably to whatever replaces it in the future.

i don't know if you are going to keep up w/ your blog down the road but even an occasional post would be welcomed. but even if you choose not to continue and turn your attentions solely on your new profession, good luck to you and thanks for the time and effort you put in to each and every entry. its nice to hear someone speak their mind the way that you did.

beakerkin said...

Bum from Jersey

You are always a friend and gentleman. I will buy a laptop and continue blogging but at a slower rate.

I am only begining to see how huge this blog became recently. This blog entertained alot of people and provoked thought an some anger.

There is no talk radio where I am going . There are none of my people but I am used to working in Jobs as the sole Jew. I will not find life easy in a small town. It is easy to disappear in NYC but in a small town I doubt it.

I had to pursue my dream the memories leave me no other choice.
We are all in this together even if we don't agree on evey policy.

Esther said...

Mazel Tov, Beak!!! I'm immensely proud of you for achieving your dream -- especially without the support of those close to you. I can most certainly relate. But you know you have our support and utter respect. Go forth and do us all proud.

Always On Watch said...

I am so glad to hear that you are now able to pursue your dream. Everyone should get at least one chance in life to have that type of fulfillment.

Try to hang onto the good memories and, at the same time, never to forget what the bastards did on 9/11. They're still up to no good because evil never surrenders--it has to be beaten into submission.

Stay safe!

beakerkin said...


My life changed on 9-11 . I am sure you know what it means when one of our kind sings Ani Mamim.
I sang that song on 9-11 as I ran north thinking of Lot's wife. I turned back several miles later but I saw way too much.

Always on the Watch

I will never forget what happened
and my fight has just begun. The enemy is not just some Jihadist at some point we are going to have to deal with the far left.

Free speeech is fine but sending aid packages to Falijah is not fine.

Mustang said...

Please do continue your Blog . . you have important things to say, and I for one need to hear them said. I hope you'll stay in touch, if not on the blog express, then feel free to contact me at

You, much more than most, know what is at stake as we enter the 21st Century. I look forward to your continued contributions. May God be with you always.

Semper fidelis,

Neptune said...

Congrats Beak,
I don't know what you will be doing and obviously, you are not at liberty to divulge details, but I'm guessing that you will be traveling overseas.
I think your sense of need to do your patriotic duty is comendable and I'm proud of you.
I wish all Americans felt the same way.
I can understand how you felt on 9/11. I was watching on TV and the sight of those people, jumping from 100 floors up, sickened me to the marrow of my soul.
Once again, wer'e proud of you and hope that you'll keep in touch. Take care of yourself.

This may sound paranoid and a bit morbid, but if you're going overseas, you should get a global positioning micro-chip implanted under your skin. That way, they can track you if you're taken hostage. A I said, I hate to be morbid, but it's worth thinking about.
Good Luck and Shalom.

drummaster2001 said...

Hail To The Beak!

beakerkin said...

Mustang and Neptune

I will be working with DHS stateside but in a small town.
For A NYC person this is a big change.

I really was touched by the sailors as the young men insisted I retrace my steps . They are the real heros I kept telling them I am a witness.

We were joined by tourists who accompanied me. I even mentioned
the Prayer that I sang as I ran North. I was never in any real danger but nobody knew.

Jews sing two prayers the most familiar is the Shema Hear O Israel.

The other prayer is strange as it is an afirmation of Messianism

Ani Mamin Bemunah Shelaymah.

Messism while facing while facing death is weird. However Warren pointed out this is a type of defiance.

The sailors are entitled to my story as they are my heros as are the veterans like Mustang, Warren, Neptune and Big Bubba.

DHS is important but not on the front line.

beakerkin said...

Drum Master

In all Rush I forgot to call my family . Ooops

Neptune said...

Glad to see you'll be in the good old USA. Your comment about no talk radio, where you are going, led me to believe that you were going overseas.
Boy ! You really are a Big City dude. You'll find that small town, USA has all of the same things that big cities have, just not as much of it.
You'll like it, after you get used to the slower pace.

drummaster2001 said...

you knew i'd find it here and spread the word to my folks.

Jason_Pappas said...

Congratulations. I hope you have time to post now and then. And I hope we’ve given you moral support as you’ve given us an example of a passionate fighter who knows what we’re up against.

Some of us know we can never go back to 9/10 – the world has changed. The others I won’t speak about now. Remember that we, in the blogosphere, come from every part of the country and from every background – and we can transcend our differences in the time of our country’s need. These are the people who count. We’re behind you.

beakerkin said...


I am mostly a Staten Islander but have spent most of the last five years in Queens and Manhattan.

This may sound funny but I am going to a state that is even more liberal then NYC. I wonder if I might be able to find Glenn Beck or Hannity.

Drum Master

I did call your Mom but Sylvia picked up and got rid of me.

Neptune said...

I reccomend the Michael Medved Radio Show, highly.
Hannity has good guest interviews, but Hannity, himself is an intellectual lightweight, in my opinion. He also lays it on too thick. He sometimes comes across as maudlin and syrupy..
Medved is an intellectual heavyweight.
Laura Ingraham is good too. She is clever and smart.
O'Reilly has a pretty good radio show, too. O'reilly has a big ego, but his show is informative.

beakerkin said...


I like Glenn Beck but can not get him in NYC. I am going to be in New England near the Canadian border .

Mark Levin is out of the question
and this is such a red State that
Rush may not even be available.

I think I have the option of four
ten hour days. I am also going to be sent to GA at some point for a month.

Who knows what is down there ?

Neptune said...

You can google and find the website for all of the talk radio shows.
The website usually has a station locator map or search box. You can click on the map or type in the city and State and it will tell you what radio stations carry the show in that area.

I have friends who live in New England, I have visited them several times and spent time in Vermont, New Hampshire and Massachusetts.
The thing that I noticed about them is that personally, they are just like the people in Virginia and the Midwest.
In their personal lives and personal preferences, they are conservative.Their attitude on most issues is conservative.But when you ask them who they vote for, they almost always say Democrat.
I think that they vote Democrat more out of tradition, than anything else.

beakerkin said...


I do not know as Vermont elected a Socialist and sent Howard Dean into
the Govenors chair. I think the area I am going to gets Montreal

B said...

Sorry for not posting on your site or adding posts on my site, but I'm sure you understand, studying for the bar takes all my time. I appreciate the complement. I agree that even though we don't agree all the time, we have educational and honest debates. I truly believe that you are passionate about your beliefs and are not espousing them for any other reason than because you believe them. I hope you understand that most people on the left are like myself and not the leftist bomb throwers. Keep doing what your heart says is right and I'll do the same. Some day we'll all meet in the middle. Peace!

justin morris said...

Tho Im new to your blog I am very impressed by what I have read. Congratulations on your new Job and hopefully do keep up your work on the blog you have so much to offer others. The truth in your words ring out like the pealing of a bell from the steeple. Keep up the good work Beak the world needs more people like you to shine out the light of truth in a world of shadowy lies.

I will continue to come back to your oasis of truth thanks. And do let us all know how things are going for you. I know the small town thing as I was transfered from Dallas to a small town in New Mexico for a few years.

Again Congrats and God Speed you in your work.


beakerkin said...


I think my Job will be 4 10 hour shifts. So there will be plenty of time for bloging. I have not given up this fight.

Thanks for the compliments and I will have plenty of tim to blog.
The transition to a real red state
Vermont may not be so bad. I lived near Union Square in NYC and that was bad. Carrying a firearm may take some for me to get used to. I have no problem doing so but I am sure Mustang and some of the others
will explain what type of holster is safest.

B You know that I have a respect for real Liberals. I agree with them more then most realize . We differ on two major points. You are
a patriot and I have high respect
for you and Kafkaesq.

The true liberal is a wonderful person . We can disagree on the war and this is okay depending largely on the argument.

The problem I have with liberals in general ( not you or Kafka) is that there is a seditious element.
The problem is displayed by the Chemist and Crew. You have a poster
who is a Communist and an anti- semite. They want to get excorsized by any deviation on the Gay agenda. Yet they have zero problem with a man posting material
from a prime contributor to Jewish
Tribal Review an antisemitic site.

As a Jewish liberal you may come to
see what I have noticed. There is a high tolerance for anti- semitism
couched in PC rhetoric. When we start getting into Holocaust minimization and Neocon cabals there is a decided problem. You may
face the choice of speaking up or
leaving . I chose to leave as I have zero tolerance for Communist bigotry.

On a personal level I have nothing
but respect for you. You are not
responsible for the rhetoric around you at times. However there
may come a time when the Neocon cabal talk gets thick. Remember who
we are and speak up with pride. The
bomb throwers rarely get upbraided
and coming from you they might listen.

Steffen said...


I'm a Citzcom regular. I'm a Liberal, and I'm right there with you. So much of my life has been in military service. As JB would tell you, I was a huge contributor where he and I ran across one another over a Jessica Lynch forum on another blog, I have a long history of standing when others don't, and I've more than once stood alone when almost every one else ran away.

JB and I and a couple of others discussed and even started preparations for CitzCom and JB finally brought it to fruition, mostly because we, as a group were just too scattered to pull it together. I think he's done a fine job, and I hope that he is able to push his blog to the forefront of blogging in general.

I'm not a leftist, but I have strong feelings both about this administration, and the things that have led us in my opinion, in wrong directions in the war on terror. I would be frontline if I could, but another war, not fully faught, claimed parts of me that can't be replaced.

So I am with you in spirit, and will say, with all my heart, stand tall, stand firm, and do not ever doubt that your voice, and in some way, ours, continue to ring out for the truth.

Jihad, my friend, is not solely a Muslim proposition. On that line, I'd lock arms with you any day to stay the flow, and beat back the demons who would take all and don't understand the National Identity any more than they understand the Jews, or Zionists, or any other group.

God Speed, sir, and write often.

beakerkin said...

Steffen I am called a liberal by most on this blog . Liberals were and still are honorable people.

Sadly some are in denial about Communist and Anti-semites in their ranks. There is no room for
conspiracy theories and bigots.

The other day JB tried to straighten out this blog pest. For heaven's sake good Marxism ,100,000,000 dead is enough. This is just as crazy as me associating with David Duke idiots. People have forgotten about 9-11 and the history of Communism.

Warren said...

Beak, I'll send you an Email.

I'm happy for you and know you'll do a first rate job.

I don't think its in you to do anything else.

Shabot Shalom