At 4AM this morning I hit a deer with my Ford. There was no damage to the car as I slowed to 5MPH and the deer was no worse for the wear. I was driving along at 30 MPH coming around a turn when a deer appeared in the middle of the road. I had oncoming trafic on one side and trees on the left. If I slammed on the brakes there was a good chance I would be in the great blog in the sky. I said Bambi it you or me and it aint going to be me.
I hit the deer and sent him flying about 10 feet but I had got the car to a stop. I remembered the sage words of a coworker if you ever hit a deer stay in the car. Do not check to see if the deer is okay. Sure enough after two minutes the buck sprang up and started to move like a mechanical bull.
I arrived at work and assumed my car must be totaled . Yet when I met my boss in the parking lot I found not even a scratch.
Naturaly the forces of evil have claimed credit for the suicide deer. 167, 147, Ducky, Hezbollah and Osama all claimed credit. My coworkers were amazed at how calm I was. I did not survive historic events to be taken out by a deer in VT. Yet having been through those events I no longer fear the unknown as it is part of life. Not that I am in a hurry to go to the afterlife . 167 assures me that as a Zionist I am hell bound. He also claims I will meet Pope John Paul, Reagan and Sharon. I'll take that company over commies any day.
Now all you Jewish motorists please remember Deer meet does not go with Kosher wine.
Leave the road kill for the poor and other scavengers like far left environloosers.