The Clinton Era policy was ruled Unconstitutional in a Court ruling in California. It would be better if a smarter policy was constructed Don't Care act with dignity. The truth is that most people don't care who is not gay. Just comport yourself with dignity and decorum.
In truth the issues of gender and preference in the work place are more confused and convoluted than ever. Women are granted very wide latitude in dress code. In my office men are required to wear a tie five days a week even when the heat index is over 100 and no visitors are present. Men have complained with some legitimacy that women can go to work in a sundress, but we can not remove our ties ever. Now if a man decided to wear a sundress he would not be acting with professionalism.
Many jobs do indeed have restrictions that can result in termination over matters in our private lives that have nothing to do with our jobs. In theory a person moonlighting as a WWE Wrestler, an arrest for DWI or a public scandal could result in termination of federal employment. Now if Bob is living with a same sex partner it isn't my business and I do not care. Similarly, if person X is committing adultery with a non coworker it is not my business. However, if the person is a coworker than serious legal issues may have been violated. There are those that would argue that a coworker moonlighting as Siegfried the Shmendrick in the WWE would create integrity issues, but I see this as low brow comedy.
In truth the atmosphere towards gays is often very lacking. People should get severely disciplined for using racial, ethnic or homophobic slurs. However, in reality only the dreaded N word is enforced. People who would end a career over an imagined slight will use the F term for gays and brag of their "gaydar" without a reservation. As a person who worked in the fashion industry for decades I am rather amused by people who claim that one can tell a persons preference by vocation. I endured this in Vermont with a nutty local who insisted because of my prior vocation, interests in art and theater as well and having lived in Soho deduced that I must be gay. A horrified HR person had a long talk with the person. I explained that as a NYC resident being gay is not a big deal.
I do not like the presence of laws that encourage otherwise law abiding citizens to break the law. Some of the worst asylum cases one sees are issues where people face abuse because of who they are. I would be much happier to live in a world where there would be no need for Lambda legal, but sadly there is. One of the oddities in the VAWA act is that it provides protections for heterosexuals, but none for gays. A very respected senior official said "abuse is abuse and someday I hope the law changes". I agree with her 100 percent.
The truth is that a coworker who is gay does not impact my job in any way. I will contrast this with enduring a coworker who is a vegan who calls my diet " the toe tag diet". I have been off full calorie soda for about five years. One of the oddities is that after this new sickness it appears that I can no longer handle carbonated beverages without horrible pain. I got a lecture about Hawaiian Punch but as I have great difficulty with solid food at the moment it is no big deal. The soup in the cafeteria was unfit for human consumption even by my low standards. However, I got a long lecture about Hawaiian Punch, Gator Aide and everything else. I am somewhat better and can eat 90% food that is scratchy like potato chips and nuts are still too painful.
We make all types of reasonable accommodations in the work place. I doubt that any of us would object to Kosher, Halal or Vegetarian meals at a party. None of us object to religious head coverings, facial hair in accordance with religious beliefs, appropriate alterations of dress policy. Do note I am not allowed to wear sunglasses while addressing the public. Similarly a person wishing to interact with the public while wearing a burkha would create similar issues. Now I do grasp that the military is a different situation, but the matter should only be addressed if problems arise. In a normal job gays require zero reasonable accommodations.
We will probably be a better society when we move to "Don't care and show some class".